The Czar loves his Xbox 360, and is delighted that its international appeal is spreading. While fellow Gormogons disagree about soccer, baseball, and, well, soccer and baseball, the Gormogons agree on fictional endorsements, and are busy playing each other with this latest release.

Test Match09 recreates all of the thrill of world cricket, including:

• Hours of fun! Level 1 alone takes you five days to complete!
• Divide play into ICC tests, supertests, Super Series, Cup Matches, Trophy Matches, Provincial Challenges, or create your own totally arbitrary and confusing series that no one will follow!
• Occasional in-game commentary lets you know the game is not on pause!
• Build your own team! Recruit the best and brightest players from local teams, train them, build them up, and totally dump them on the street when a third-rate prospect from Pakistan becomes available!
• Complete achievements and unlock special features: Indian riots, Australian racism, drug abuse, doping scandals, and 56 more!
• Live connectivity lets you play against dozens of cricket fans around the world!

What a great way to celebrate one of the least relevent imperial legacies. Hey, POTUS Obama is even rumored to be a fan, thanks to a gift from PM Brown.

The Czar of Muscovy

Божію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, and was cheated out of total control of all Russia upon the death of Boris Mikhailovich, who replaced Alexander Yaroslav Nevsky in 1263. However, in 1283, our Czar was passed over due to a clerical error and the rule of all Russia went to his second cousin Daniil (Даниил Александрович), whom Czar still resents. As a half-hearted apology, the Czar was awarded control over Muscovy, inconveniently located 5,000 miles away just outside Chicago. He now spends his time seething about this and writing about other stuff that bothers him.