GormogoniCon 2009 Update
Wow! Tickets are completely sold out for the upcoming GormogoniCon 2009. We have never had a complete sell-out before, and the Czar attributes it to this being the first year we made the existence of our ultra-secret convention known by promoting openly on the world wide web.
Anyway, many of you have received your ticket(s), and the remainder of you should be getting them in the mail no later than Friday of this week. Please take careful note of the day and seating location on your ticket(s), as (a) seating is 100% sold, so there are no empty chairs, and (b) the Mandarin tends to electrocute those who mock him by changing seats. We do not want a repeat of last year.
The location is on your ticket face, and remember…we are in the Regent Room this year.
Божію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, and was cheated out of total control of all Russia upon the death of Boris Mikhailovich, who replaced Alexander Yaroslav Nevsky in 1263. However, in 1283, our Czar was passed over due to a clerical error and the rule of all Russia went to his second cousin Daniil (Даниил Александрович), whom Czar still resents. As a half-hearted apology, the Czar was awarded control over Muscovy, inconveniently located 5,000 miles away just outside Chicago. He now spends his time seething about this and writing about other stuff that bothers him.