It seems like one of those science fiction clichés, where a news story from the future drops some weird headline that seems very implausible by today’s standards. And yet, here it is.

The country of Lesotho is officially open to the idea of unifying with the Republic of South Africa. Allegedly, the public support is increasing to where tens, if not hundreds, of thousands of signatures could be obtained and formally presented to the Lesotho government for a referendum.

The cause is simple enough. To the increasingly frustrated population of Lesotho, the good jobs and the good times are to be had all around Lesotho—bearing in mind that all around Lesotho is, literally, the RSA. The movement has long existed, but has only recently gained serious momentum as the economic situation worsens in Lesotho. Apparently, documents have been drawn up to sweeten the deal, including a plan to harmonize the constitutions of the two countries, open the borders to migrant workers, and so on.

Gormogons Spotlight On: LesothoMost of the folks advocating the merger are aligned on the political left, and have the support of union miners. Cynically, the loss of potential union miners to South African mines would certainly explain the union interest in Lesotho’s incorporation as a South African province. Further, in a province, the union would now have access to millions of South African members.

But there are some problems the Czar can predict. First, it is beyond optimistic that South Africa, still trying to rebuild a shattered economy and deal with its own crushing unemployment, would gladly accept 2 million more under-skilled and hungry mouths. Second, there are major cultural difference between South Africans and Basotho: to be blunt, Basotho would be the lowest rung on the nine rung cultural ladder already in place. While the Basotho assume that the bigger, wealthier South Africans could make all their problems go away, the reality is that Lesotho would, as the second smallest province of this new merger, simply inherit all the problems of the bigger country. The problems would not divide into smaller pieces but multiply.

And so we see that liberals in Lesotho can be just as fanciful as their American counterparts. A shame reality is not so accommodating.

The Czar of Muscovy

Божію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, and was cheated out of total control of all Russia upon the death of Boris Mikhailovich, who replaced Alexander Yaroslav Nevsky in 1263. However, in 1283, our Czar was passed over due to a clerical error and the rule of all Russia went to his second cousin Daniil (Даниил Александрович), whom Czar still resents. As a half-hearted apology, the Czar was awarded control over Muscovy, inconveniently located 5,000 miles away just outside Chicago. He now spends his time seething about this and writing about other stuff that bothers him.