Or So The Germans Would Have You Believe
Instapundit links to this bit of University of Tennessee news. UT claims to have developed the fourth supercomputer (and first academic supercomputer) to break the petascale barrier. ‘Puer doesn’t know from technology, but GorT and the Mandarin assure ‘Puter this is an accomplishment of no small import.
However, the article only mentions the location of one of the remaining three: Oak Ridge National Laboratory. From this article, it sounds as if one also exists at Los Alamos National Laboratory. So, to recap. Three of the four existing petascale supercomputers are at locations associated with the American nuclear weapons program.
Nothing to see here. Move along.
P.S. ‘Puter wonders apropos of nothing whether the FTC will now investigate Professor Reynolds for pimping his academic institution employer. ‘Puter hopes the FTC does investigate him, for hilarity would most certainly ensue.
P.P.S. Also, wanna take bets as to where the fourth computer is (and ‘Puter bets there are more than four in existence)? Fort Meade, MD? Langley, VA? Arlington, VA? Castle Gormogon basement behind the dessicated corpses?
Always right, unless he isn’t, the infallible Ghettoputer F. X. Gormogons claims to be an in-law of the Volgi, although no one really believes this.
’Puter carefully follows economic and financial trends, legal affairs, and serves as the Gormogons’ financial and legal advisor. He successfully defended us against a lawsuit from a liquor distributor worth hundreds of thousands of dollars in unpaid deliveries of bootleg shandies.
The Geep has an IQ so high it is untestable and attempts to measure it have resulted in dangerously unstable results as well as injuries to researchers. Coincidentally, he publishes intelligence tests as a side gig.
His sarcasm is so highly developed it borders on the psychic, and he is often able to insult a person even before meeting them. ’Puter enjoys hunting small game with 000 slugs and punt guns, correcting homilies in real time at Mass, and undermining unions. ’Puter likes to wear a hockey mask and carry an axe into public campgrounds, where he bursts into people’s tents and screams. As you might expect, he has been shot several times but remains completely undeterred.
He assures us that his obsessive fawning over news stories involving women teachers sleeping with young students is not Freudian in any way, although he admits something similar once happened to him. Uniquely, ’Puter is unable to speak, read, or write Russian, but he is able to sing it fluently.
Geep joined the order in the mid-1980s. He arrived at the Castle door with dozens of steamer trunks and an inarticulate hissing creature of astonishingly low intelligence he calls “Sleestak.” Ghettoputer appears to make his wishes known to Sleestak, although no one is sure whether this is the result of complex sign language, expert body posture reading, or simply beating Sleestak with a rubber mallet.
‘Puter suggests the Czar suck it.