Nice job, marketing department, letting this guy speak: “Sports cars have to be red, but we wanted a new red. So we came up with shoujyouhi red, the traditional red color of a Japanese monkey’s ass.” —Tetsuya Tada, chief engineer … Continue reading →
If you love The Dark Knight movies, as the Mandarin does, you will love this video. Short, and eye-wateringly funny. If you are not as kind to them, as the Czar is not, the video sort of explains why. Dead-on … Continue reading →
The Czar has been keeping an eye on things for a while. If he were an idiot, he might be inclined to think that: —The stimulus package has saved 650 trillion jobs, simply because the White House says so. —The … Continue reading →
Item the First: The Czar notes the following text: “Homosexuality refers to relations between men or between women who experience an exclusive or predominant sexual attraction toward persons of the same sex.” Evidently, a threesome between ‘Puter and two women, … Continue reading →
In this editorial, the Washington Post’s editorial board tars Republican candidate for Virginia Attorney General Kenneth Cuccinelli as a bigot. The WaPo takes umbrage at Mr. Cuccinelli’s assertion that homosexual acts are “intrinsically wrong” and represent “behavior that is not … Continue reading →
The White House and democrats are poised to start crowing about the success of the American Reinvestment and Recovery Act of 2009 with data showing 650,000 jobs “created or saved”. This number represents about $150 billion of the $339 billion … Continue reading →
And just a few days ago the Czar was describing how wiggly ferret Tony Blair was most likely going to be named the President of Europe. And greasy flounder Gordon Brown completely endorsed Blair as the best possible candidate! Within … Continue reading →
Two dozen House members are being investigated by the House Committee on Standards of Official Conduct. This is actually pretty normal: some will be proven guilty, some found innocent, and some guilty as all freaking hell. The details were written … Continue reading →
Holly Bailey of Newsweek has just completed her seventh-grade Civics class, and is now experimenting with snark. Except the snark bites with his teeth, dear. We quote in full, because, well, this sucks as writing. And we had such hope … Continue reading →
Well happy freaking birthday Internet. Invented by a twenty-one-year-old Al Gore, the Internet turns 40 today. Of course, then, she was ARPANet, when the very first message was sent betwen UCLA to Stanford, in which it announced that Mars will … Continue reading →
The federal government is huge and inefficient so why would anyone believe that a government-run health care option would do better than private industry? Maybe I’m jumping the gun with the first part of that statement, so let me give … Continue reading →
So rather than let GM crater in a richly deserved bankruptcy, the federal government (both Bush and Obama administrations) decided to bail out/buy out the Detroit automaker. Not content to bail out/buy out only one failed business model, the federal … Continue reading →
This summer, Iran detained three American hikers who allegedly strayed into Iran, accusing them of espionage. The hikers’ families just released a video they claim definitively shows the hikers could not have been spies. In the video shot a day … Continue reading →
A Gallup poll on liberal attitudes is a bit like polling 12-year-olds on whether they like cell phones. Therefore, the outcome of their most recent liberal attitudes poll comes as a welcome surprise: even Gallup concedes that liberalism has more … Continue reading →
Your Mandarin was perusing his November 2009 issue of the American Rifleman magazine this morning and came across this news brief: Back in 2005, after an article in the British Medical Journal called for a ban on pointed kitchen knives … Continue reading →
Europe really hates Scientology, which is something the Czar thinks Europeans are getting right. Scientology was allegedly founded by L. Ron Hubbard on a $5 bet concerning how gullible people are; the Paris criminal court decided what we already know: … Continue reading →
It’s official. New York is the modern-day equivalent of 1930s Oklahoma, with its residents fleeing intolerable conditions for a better future in more hospitable climes. The crime of it all is that unlike Oklahoma in the 1930s, New York’s downfall … Continue reading →
FBI: 50 Children Rescued From Prostitution in National Sting says Fox News headline. The Czar read it, but could find no mention of ACORN. Are they not sponsoring this behavior anymore? The Czar of MuscovyБожію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный … Continue reading →
Both Australia and Japan have offered strong ideas on a reorganized international power bloc to shore up the aging ASEAN. The two ideas are not compatible, strictly speaking. Australia wants more US involvement, and Japan wants less. None of this … Continue reading →
Ban-Ki Mun writes an open letter to the American people in the New York Times saying that we can sign the Copenhagen bill that (a) President Obama has been stalling on and (b) puts the United Nations in charge of … Continue reading →
The Czar and the Mandarin were having dinner with the president of a union trade business this past week. He tolerates only union workers, a point which he is fond to make. Since he was buying dinner and large amounts … Continue reading →
You guys set a pretty high standard—I’ve read a few blogs that don’t and they’re not worth the electrons they’re printed on. See ‘Puter? Quality pays off! The Czar of MuscovyБожію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, … Continue reading →
The Wall Street Journal provides an amazing critique (and possible explanation) behind the Obama administration’s otherwise moonbat fixation with Fox News. The Czar agrees with this pretty much throughout, but feels there is not enough emphasis on the President’s dismissal … Continue reading →
Microsoft, rightly so, has been much maligned for it’s overly chatty “security” features in Vista where almost any action (in the default setting) prompts the user to allow or deny the action. Yes, you gearheads, I know this is somewhat … Continue reading →
If any reader is wondering how ‘Puter managed to haul his lazy rear end all the way to the Leaping Peacock (200 yards away from Castle Gormogon) in the first instance, look no further. Behold! ‘Puter’s sweet ride, borrowed from … Continue reading →
Imagine your Mandarin’s surprise when he read this headline – Barak Obama sees worst poll rating drop in 50 years – for this article from the Telegraph.co.uk online. I thought Obama had only been in office for less than year, … Continue reading →
Senator Harry Reid, we hardly knew ye. It has been made pretty clear that if Senator Harry Reid puts forth a public option in the health care bill, voters will throw him out of office. So in response, Senator Reid … Continue reading →
We need to clean out the dungeon, lay down some fresh straw and call the butcher shop. The Czar’s pet Oksana is coming home after her successful Central Asian tour. **’Puter meant to label the post “Stern Bears” but Volgi … Continue reading →
You know, the Czar is getting annoyed with allegations that puts up some pretty obscene bar tabs, and that he does some pretty serious damage each night because of it. On a hunch, the Czar decided to see whether he … Continue reading →
But apparently dumber ’n a box o’ rocks. Watch Jesse’s face. Just awesome. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →The Czar is attempting to catch up on his movie watching. Well aware that folks no less than Jonah Goldberg have criticized certain films as strongly liberal, the Czar must concede he does not see it. Some of these films … Continue reading →
…and defend Rush Limbaugh The Age of Barack is bringing folks together…in some very surprising ways. Incidentally, for you kids who’ve grown up recently and have only heard the slur “house Negro,” just know that it’s a polite circumlocution for … Continue reading →
Today we learn that Megan Williams, who claimed under oath that she was kidnapped, brutally raped and tortured, made the entire story up. The story then tiptoes around the fact that the woman may be recanting because she is mentally … Continue reading →
Now meet his mother: Yes, that’s a Soviet uniform. You think your family has issues. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →Is just something I like to say. But this piece should give you some good ammo next time some boho bozo starts blathering on about sustainable urbanism, or whatever they’re calling it this week: In fact, lack of ethnic diversity … Continue reading →
According to this article from AOL news, the number of married Catholic priests could grow sharply as a result of the Vatican’s decision to take in thousands of Anglicans and Episcopalians into the Catholic Church. I agree with the quote … Continue reading →
Lookit. Click to embiggen. Via Big Government. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →Deemed too big to fail. The Czar of MuscovyБожію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, and was cheated out of total control of all … Continue reading →
What do conservatives and liberals have in common? They both pretend to shun Fox News. The interesting thing is that both camps generally do it for the same reason. First, let us review. The Obama adminstration hates, hates, hates Fox … Continue reading →
The White House—that is, co-presidents Obama and Gibbs—are crowing that a Washington Post/ABC poll is proclaiming that 57% of Americans would consider a public healthcare option. To put it another way, which ABC would if Bush were President, “Nearly one … Continue reading →
Well, as you can see, the Mandarin is back to work. And he had great news for the Czar: the, um, experiment is totally ready. Tests concluded that the Mandarin was able to land his product in the exact center … Continue reading →
Well at least Fox News hasn’t named GorT and your Mandarin outright in this story about the Large Hadron Collider. According to the news story, Danish physicist Dr. Holger Bech Nielsen and Japanese physicist Dr. Masao Ninomiya claim that “nature” … Continue reading →
To do what this distraught father did. ‘Puter can’t recall precisely how many times he’s exclaimed “Jeebus, ‘Puter, Jr. Did you really need to supersize that bucket of the Colonel’s finest? ‘Puter’s gonna need an icebreaker to clear this log … Continue reading →
President Obama talks tough on Sudan! Either Sudan comes around to his way of thinking, or the President will use the international community to subject Sudan to talk and talk of further threats. That oughta do it. Because it completely … Continue reading →
Click the “play” button. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →Just imagine if the progressive whackjobs that ran Europe into the ground decided to get together, and form a Euro-supergroup, a rock band of megastars who would basically do it all over, but this time as one gasping grab at … Continue reading →
One thing about reading the Big G as you do, is that you learn about all sorts of faraway places. Like National Geographic, but with less beautiful photography and even less whining. Today, for example, we cannot ignore what might … Continue reading →
Keep watching the skies for Orbital Mind-Control Lasers. (Also, don’t do ether, kids.) Via FilmDrunk. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →ABC News has decided two things about balloon-boy Falcon Heene (pronounced “heenie,” like the H1N1 virus is pronounced): 1. He is like Tom Sawyer, a truly colorful and splendid literary character full of charm and whimsy, if not in some … Continue reading →
Here is a story not being covered here in the enlightened United States. A Louisiana justice of the peace has denied a mixed-race couple of marriage, saying that mixed race marriages are inherently bad for the children. JP Keith Bardwell … Continue reading →
In a textbook example of Solomon-like judicial reasoning, a New York Supreme Court (county level trial court) justice granted an injunction to petitioning nurses preventing enforcement of the state-mandated swine flu vaccinations for all health care workers. ‘Puter would like … Continue reading →
Brian Kilmeade, a morning host on Fox & Friends, let loose with his best unintentional(?) slip-up to date. This morning, during a segment on removing pet stains from carpets, padding and subfloors, a goat, a sheep and a pig were … Continue reading →
What a knee-slapping exercise in media gullability. Based on conversations the Czar had in the last 24 hours, as well as a timely email from Gormogons secret operative MC (“BTW, Putin couldn’t meet with Hillary because he and I have … Continue reading →
No, I’m not talking about the Billy Crystal / Gregory Hines movie from the 80s. I’m describing what the current administration and congressional democrats are doing with the healthcare reform effort. They are attempting to ramrod through the bill before … Continue reading →
Bill Gates is irate that environmental restrictions are prohibiting starving communities in Africa to use the genetically modified foods that would actually help them grow food in their climates. Why, he cries, why? If there is anyone who stays inside … Continue reading →
The Czar would stay out of the Rush Limbaugh story, thank you. The Czar cares little for Mr. Limbaugh’s style of broadcasting, but unlike every one of his critics, the Czar has actually heard Rush Limbaugh’s show in its entirety … Continue reading →
Look, crazy Obama cultists. If you’re going to offend people by deifying President Obama, go big or go home. May ‘Puter recommend that school children in Chicago sing the third verse of O, Holy Night while kneeling before a likeness … Continue reading →
Me or your lyin’ eyes? This is the position of Burlington Township (NJ) Superintendent of Schools Christopher Manno regarding the cult-like, glassy-eyed version of My Comrade Obama Will Let A Thousand Flowers Bloom, or whatever they’re calling that tuneless, hypnotic … Continue reading →
Mrs. GorT is familiar with the videotaping rights as she has done similar services (not of amateur presidential worship songs) for our kids’ school. When she started a number of years ago, she knew that parents had to sign waivers … Continue reading →
‘Puter takes note of the Burlington (NJ) Township Board of Education Meeting tonight. You remember, the place where second-graders performed a creepy, Mao-like cult of personality song extolling our Forty-fourth President. One of the parents is seeking answers as to … Continue reading →
The Czar is delightfully familiar with the poems of Li Po, who may indeed be the Volgi’s brother given their ages. A small sampling of the great Li Po’s work: If the heavens were not in love with wine, There’d … Continue reading →
Царь наш, Confucius’s brother Li Bai (whom you met here) once commented that at least one volume of his autobiography would likely bear the title Alcohol Was Involved. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →You have probably noticed your own lack of surprise, when reading a bizarrely tragic news story, at the words “alchohol was believed to be a factor.” A man burns his friends with a homemade firework, and so on…alchohol was believed … Continue reading →
The Mandarin is away on business, standing in the middle of a desert, covered in white dust, with a silver coat on and huge goggles, holding a clipboard while watching a large fiery red cloud mushroom upwards while muttering approvals … Continue reading →
The Czar is most displeased with national referenda, as they waste time and bypass the needed representation republic structure a country of our size and shape needs. But he cannot help wondering if the national healthcare squabble (which the Democrats … Continue reading →
“Prince can’t believe she’s going out with Lestat, either.” Lileks. Source (much bigger, better image). Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →The insurance industry released a report that concluded that ObamaCare “reforms” (as presently planned) would skyrocket healthcare costs. The White House is foot-stamping mad about this. How could they say this? How could they scare Americans like this? Probably, um, … Continue reading →
More genius here. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →You would think that a historian so well versed in President Wilson would run screaming for cover when thinking about President Obama. The Czar of MuscovyБожію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was … Continue reading →
An amazing story. Everyone should read it and marvel what one man can do to improve the lives (and deaths) of thousands of people. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →MS: Well, I think in naked political terms, I said this a few weeks ago, Hugh, that I think this, if you’re on the political left, this is the fastest way to a permanent left of center political culture. You … Continue reading →
John Noonan writes: The AFP is reporting that despite pulling the ground based mid-course interceptor from Europe, the Russians remain unhappy with Noble Laureate Obama’s missile defense plans. Ivan is, of course, playing the classic Russian game here — push … Continue reading →
Let us give kudos where it is due. In what may be the Obama administration’s first tangible win, Armenia and Turkey have normalized relations, which is incredible if you have ever spoken to Armenians about Turks. Secretary of State Hillary … Continue reading →
Since the world is ending before the 2016 Olympics, everyone is in a big rush to avoid fossil fuel energy sources and working towards these “renewable” energy sources. We’ve discussed this before – the real bottom line in energy production … Continue reading →
CNN reports that Americans are divided—probably another 80/20 tie, right Gort?—over whether President Obama has done enough to merit his Nobel Peace Prize. The CNN report reaffirms the Czar’s ongoing speculation that people fall into two camps: 1. People who … Continue reading →
GorT was pleased to see this news story from researchers at University of Missouri. The promise that this kind of technological research is impressive. I’m waiting for the fearmongering to begin. You know, the fear of planes crashing into flashlights … Continue reading →
You are aware of crushing recent information confirming global climate change data are missing, extrapolated from a sample of one, and the result of a spreadsheet glitch. But the global change fantasists remain convinced that the earth is melting so … Continue reading →
Life imitates Happy Gilmore. Seriously, old dude, if an alligator wants your golf ball, let him have it. 'PuterAlways right, unless he isn’t, the infallible Ghettoputer F. X. Gormogons claims to be an in-law of the Volgi, although no one … Continue reading →
‘Puter’s spent a little time this morning thinking about the Nobel Committee awarding President Obama the Peace Prize. The Committee’s stated rationale for bestowing the award on our President is to recognize his “extraordinary efforts to strengthen international diplomacy and … Continue reading →
The Russians may be aiding Iran in designing nuclear warheads. If true, look for an all-out Middle East war coming soon to a location near you. 'PuterAlways right, unless he isn’t, the infallible Ghettoputer F. X. Gormogons claims to be … Continue reading →
‘Puter was lounging in the Castle Gormogon rumpus room the other night watching his assistant Sleestak beat Czar’s houseboy Dat Ho in a rousing game of Twister/Jenga that their lot is wont to play, when it occurred to ‘Puter that … Continue reading →
Governor Jon Corzine (D) of New Jersey is locked in a tight reelection campaign against Chris Christie (R). The campaign has been acrimonious, even by the Garbage State’s low standards. Plumbing new depths this week was Mr. Corzine, who aired … Continue reading →
Have you heard about the recent Gallup poll that made a mistake? Probably not. I put little weight in these national polls especially when it’s a poll teamed up with some sort of media outlet (a newspaper, a television outlet, … Continue reading →
The Czar goes through his mail. The almighty Borepatch writes in to say: 😉 (Doesn’t this make you glad you don’t have comments?) Heck, BP, the Czar would welcome comments like that all day long. Trust all is well. Meanwhile, … Continue reading →
The Department of Homeland Insecurity has decided to strip Maricopa County Sherriff Joe Arpaio of his authority to arrest suspected illegal immigrants based solely on their immigration status. When a reporter asked Willie Sutton why he robbed banks he responded, … Continue reading →
He’s getting a little hooked on this song ever since he heard it on a trailer for Where the Wild Things Are. By the way, the song is not in the movie. It was used as trailer filler, and word … Continue reading →
Instapundit links to this bit of University of Tennessee news. UT claims to have developed the fourth supercomputer (and first academic supercomputer) to break the petascale barrier. ‘Puer doesn’t know from technology, but GorT and the Mandarin assure ‘Puter this … Continue reading →
Hang on, because the Czar is going to let both sides have it today. Do you like to comment on people’s blogs with your own opinions? You do? Well, at least you understand why we have that turned off here. … Continue reading →
Apologizing for the Commander-in-Chief’s apparent lack of ability to command, the Washington Post wants you to know that Gen. Stanley McChrystal is not Douglas MacArthur—actually, he loves the fact that the President is taking his time with American lives. Acknowledging … Continue reading →
The Czar, frankly, is getting a wee-bit tired of the MSM pointing out (gasp) that comedians are getting away with making fun of Obama. From Conan O’Brien’s spot-on send-up of Michelle Obama to SNL’s increasingly less-than-realistic Fred Armisen/Obama impression, suddenly … Continue reading →
With the Volgi away taking care of matters, the Czar foolishly agreed to cover for him while he was gone. Needless to say, this place has gone to hell and he’s only been gone for a day. The phone hasn’t … Continue reading →
The Jerusalem Post has an editorial that discusses what would happen if Iran fully complied with nuclear restrictions. It is worth a read, but it is not necessary for you to do so to continue herein. The editorial makes the … Continue reading →
The Federal Trade Commission now expects blogs to reveal any endorsements they get or receive to reveal potential conflicts of interests. Very well. 孔夫子, the Œcumenical Volgi (The Notorious ŒV) receives free catalogs from Obscurity Press, in return for positive … Continue reading →
Our thanks to GorT. He really is the coolest robot, provided he doesn’t rip your head off for one of his “upgrades,” Puny humans. “We apologize in advance if we kill one of your favorite tags (send an email and … Continue reading →
This might be pulling back the curtain when our regular readers don’t really care, but apparently we’ve hit a limit on the number of unique tags (see the bottom of the posts) for our site. The Czar dismissively waved his … Continue reading →
Well, not quite. The Volgi’s had a death in the family, so will be out of pocket for a bit. In the meantime, don’t forget that Zbig Brzezinski (on whom see the Czar below) was most recently in the news … Continue reading →
There’s an interesting article in today’s New York Times concerning availability and distribution of the swine flu vaccine. The most interesting part of the article was Secretary of Health and Human Services Kathleen Sebelius’ comments. When asked about the confusion … Continue reading →
What’s this? A Vietnames Buddhist monk complains that the country is not giving them religious freedom? Dude. You live in a communist country. This rates about a 1 on the Czar’s shock factor scale. Feel free to ask a Polish … Continue reading →
The New York Times, in its struggling effort to stay non-trivial, posts an editorial today on Zbigniew Brzezinski, the latter commenting on what the Obama administration should do about Afghanistan. For those of you who do not recognize the name—and … Continue reading →
