So the Obama Administration has targeted a number of groups, largely behind outcries from the left that these organizations “make too much profit” – oil/gas companies, banks, federal IT contractors, insurance companies, etc.  I’m waiting for the next shoe to drop.  It might go something like this.

AP, May 15, 2010 – Today President Obama unveiled a new program entitled HAIR (Hollywood Actors Income Reform) aimed at addressing the inequity in income derived from television and movies.  The 2009 film season, culminating in the Oscars and Emmys earlier this year, was a record breaking year in box office profits.  Press Secretary Robert Gibbs said on the Sunday talk show circuit, “these obscene profits for a system of entertainment that is broken must be stopped and President Obama is committed to changing these behaviors.”  Ken Howard, president of the Screen Actors Guild, responded, “while we support the president in many of his efforts, we disagree strongly that Hollywood is broken.  We lead the world in creating stellar entertainment and we continue to revolutionize the television and film markets with technological leaps.  A super majority of patents that exist in the entertainment field are held by Americans.  Sure, plenty of people have given up on shows like Lost, Twin Peaks, 24 and Heroes because they don’t have the previous episodes covered.  But the shows are still entertaining.  And really, we’re talking about such a small minority of the American viewership that’s affected.”

The administration released an outline of the HAIR policy elements that included the following:

• Similar to FAR §15.404-4a, paragraph 4i, item C, companies and individuals creating, developing or managing content or delivery of entertainment material in the United States shall be limited to a 10% limit on fee or profit.

• An Entertainment Tax will be levied upon all households earning $187,156 individually or $264,345 filing jointly in the amount of $0.31 per hour of entertainment material consumption by any media (i.e. Radio, Television, internet, puppet shows)

• A new federal agency will be created to oversee the monitoring and administration of said taxes.  This agency will have a seat on president’s cabinet.

• Every piece of entertainment material will require a majority of American unionized labor to participate at all levels from conception to final presentation.

There was a large outcry from the Reality Show PAC, who have secured 15 congressional representatives to oppose the legislation unless formal language is inserted into the final bill exempting reality shows from various requirements and fees.  President Obama said, “we will rise above our petty politics and do what is right for coach potatoes everywhere.  This bill MUST pass.  I will work tirelessly until we secure the votes needed to ensure its passage.  There is no special treatment for the likes of Brad Pitt, Michael Douglas or George Clooney anymore.  They are working Americans just like every other working American.  We all need to tighten our belts and if the greedy excesses of Hollywood can be better put towards the best boys and key grips who worked on these productions, then so be it!”

GorT

GorT is an eight-foot-tall robot from the 51ˢᵗ Century who routinely time-travels to steal expensive technology from the future and return it to the past for retroinvention. The profits from this pay all the Gormogons’ bills, including subsidizing this website. Some of the products he has introduced from the future include oven mitts, the Guinness widget, Oxy-Clean, and Dr. Pepper. Due to his immense cybernetic brain, GorT is able to produce a post in 0.023 seconds and research it in even less time. Only ’Puter spends less time on research. GorT speaks entirely in zeros and ones, but occasionally throws in a ڭ to annoy the Volgi. He is a massive proponent of science, technology, and energy development, and enjoys nothing more than taking the Czar’s more interesting scientific theories, going into the past, publishing them as his own, and then returning to take credit for them. He is the only Gormogon who is capable of doing math. Possessed of incredible strength, he understands the awesome responsibility that follows and only uses it to hurt people.