Hopefully…
…this isn’t the future of our Space Shuttles.
Rough translation for those who do’t read Russian:
An unprecedented case. Seemingly abandoned spaceship on the streets of Moscow – it is something from the realm of fantasy. But alas, this is the true reality. Correspondent “MK” discovered the Soviet “Buran” orbiter laying like garbage on the outskirts of the capital. Nobody cares what was once a symbol of cosmic power of our country.
Natalia Muschinkina
GorT is an eight-foot-tall robot from the 51ˢᵗ Century who routinely time-travels to steal expensive technology from the future and return it to the past for retroinvention. The profits from this pay all the Gormogons’ bills, including subsidizing this website. Some of the products he has introduced from the future include oven mitts, the Guinness widget, Oxy-Clean, and Dr. Pepper. Due to his immense cybernetic brain, GorT is able to produce a post in 0.023 seconds and research it in even less time. Only ’Puter spends less time on research. GorT speaks entirely in zeros and ones, but occasionally throws in a ڭ to annoy the Volgi. He is a massive proponent of science, technology, and energy development, and enjoys nothing more than taking the Czar’s more interesting scientific theories, going into the past, publishing them as his own, and then returning to take credit for them. He is the only Gormogon who is capable of doing math. Possessed of incredible strength, he understands the awesome responsibility that follows and only uses it to hurt people.