Ah, Barney Frank: the Congressman everybody loves to hate. If you really needed a stereotype of a Congress member who does everything wrong yet retains his or her job, Frank is a good one.

The Boston Herald just discovered something interesting that should make challenger Sean Bielat’s job a heckuva lot easier.

On February 23, 2009, Rep. Frank announced that he would not accept any PAC donations from any TARP recipients (including their executives). Because that would be a clear conflict of interest, right?

Most noble. But yet he accepted $22,000 from Bank of America, a notable TARP recipient.

Oh, and $10,000 from Bank of New York Mellon Corporation, another TARP recipient.

And $2,000 from Financial Services Roundtable, a PAC composed of Bank of America, JP Morgan Chase, and Wells Fargo (all TARP recipients).

Plus $1,000 from US Bancorp, a TARP recipient.

And another $5,000 from other TARP recipients, grand totalling $40,000 for his campaign.

Well, you know, said a Frank spokesperson, he meant he would decline only the top 10 donations but it would be okay to keep the rest…although so far he seems to have kept those top 10 ones, too. Unless, of course, there were even larger donations we know nothing about yet. Are those not in the top 10? Yes, it seems, but what Rep. Frank meant was that he would be okay to receive money provided the donor has repaid its debts.

So when he said he would not accept any money whatsoever from TARP recipients or their executives, what this clearly implied is that he will not accept money unless they repay their loans, or, if they do not, he will eventually return the top ten largest donations but pocket the rest—for those of you not up on your higher level financial terminology like Rep. Frank, who sometimes forgets how little you all know about finance.

Thank goodness he cleared that up subtlety of financial terminology, or we might think he was a money-grabbing jackass hypocrite. Not like that Sean Bielat: “Mr. Bielat’s eagerness to serve as the agent of those wealthy Wall Streeters who seek to undo the financial reform bill explains why this race has become so expensive and why it is so important in order to prevent another economic crisis.” See? Bielat is in the pocket of wealthy Wall Streeters!

Like Bank of America. Or New York Mellon. Or JP Morgan Chase. Or Wells Fargo. Or US Bancorp. Here is another bit of financial terminology you should know: Busted.

The Czar of Muscovy

Божію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, and was cheated out of total control of all Russia upon the death of Boris Mikhailovich, who replaced Alexander Yaroslav Nevsky in 1263. However, in 1283, our Czar was passed over due to a clerical error and the rule of all Russia went to his second cousin Daniil (Даниил Александрович), whom Czar still resents. As a half-hearted apology, the Czar was awarded control over Muscovy, inconveniently located 5,000 miles away just outside Chicago. He now spends his time seething about this and writing about other stuff that bothers him.