And now, your science news roundup!

Once believed to be an ancient, surviving plant from millions of years ago, we sadly now realize that cycads only date back about 12 million years. They are descended from the same plants dinosaurs would have known, but sadly are not the same species.

Laser-induced breakdown spectroscopy can help trace the geographic origins with about 95% accuracy. While this has no current commercial applications, the hope is that blood diamonds could be identified prior to sale.

Scientists on the International Space Station received a rude awakening Sunday morning when an insect-like alien race swarmed through the station as a prelude to a more massive invasion of Earth. Although communications were lost with the station for several hours, the on-board half-dozen crewmembers bravely repelled the threat using makeshift weapons and electrifying the hull with a car battery.

The Czar of Muscovy

Божію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, and was cheated out of total control of all Russia upon the death of Boris Mikhailovich, who replaced Alexander Yaroslav Nevsky in 1263. However, in 1283, our Czar was passed over due to a clerical error and the rule of all Russia went to his second cousin Daniil (Даниил Александрович), whom Czar still resents. As a half-hearted apology, the Czar was awarded control over Muscovy, inconveniently located 5,000 miles away just outside Chicago. He now spends his time seething about this and writing about other stuff that bothers him.