I Don’t Think That Word Means What You Think It Means
The Obama Administration is out touting all the great jobs they’ve “created or saved”. Except that the jobs reports haven’t been that great. I’m sure someone had to tackle and duct tape Joe Biden’s mouth before he declared “Summer of Recovery III: Now we really mean it”. The jobs report for May estimates 133,000 jobs added from April to May. Analysts had expected to see at least 150,000 jobs added. In addition, the April jobs report was revised down from 119,000 jobs added to 113,000 jobs added.
House Republicans have sent 28 jobs bills to the Senate only to watch Senate leader Harry Reid (D-NV) table them. Of course, I’m sure the Senate is busy working on the federal budget…oh wait:
GorT is an eight-foot-tall robot from the 51ˢᵗ Century who routinely time-travels to steal expensive technology from the future and return it to the past for retroinvention. The profits from this pay all the Gormogons’ bills, including subsidizing this website. Some of the products he has introduced from the future include oven mitts, the Guinness widget, Oxy-Clean, and Dr. Pepper. Due to his immense cybernetic brain, GorT is able to produce a post in 0.023 seconds and research it in even less time. Only ’Puter spends less time on research. GorT speaks entirely in zeros and ones, but occasionally throws in a ڭ to annoy the Volgi. He is a massive proponent of science, technology, and energy development, and enjoys nothing more than taking the Czar’s more interesting scientific theories, going into the past, publishing them as his own, and then returning to take credit for them. He is the only Gormogon who is capable of doing math. Possessed of incredible strength, he understands the awesome responsibility that follows and only uses it to hurt people.