GorT On Vacation
GorT and family are on vacation this week visiting the lovely Palmetto State. It’s been a frequent destination for the family and we enjoy it tremendously. We’ve had a spat of thunderstorms but all-in-all the kids are having fun, we’ve visited with some relatives and GorT’s internal clock is still functioning (years of waking early have programmed it beyond adjustment) but he is relaxing with morning bike rides before the rest of the house wakes.
The one note I’d make is Interstate 95. I understand that I-95 serves as a major artery for commuter, vacationer, and interstate commerce shipping but what I don’t understand is why the highway planners didn’t build it to accommodate the traffic load better. We have left for the south at various times – as early as 4:30am and this year marked the latest at 8:15am (we have additional non-family members traveling with us and didn’t want to subject them to a super-early morning). Traffic was fine until the HOV lanes ended around Dumfries, Virginia. Then, I-95 reduces those 5 lanes to 3 lanes and further south it narrows to 2 lanes. Once past the Virginia-North Carolina border, traffic dissipated and the rest of the drive was fine – aside from the (largely NC drivers) who wouldn’t pass other vehicles and hang out in the left lane. Even with an increase in stops, we made it to our destination in decent time without incident after passing many “Peaches & Fireworks – next exit” signs.
I’m sure the families around us on the beach aren’t happy with the glare off GorT’s hyper-polished titanium-molybdenum outer skin, but there’s little to do about that.
GorT is an eight-foot-tall robot from the 51ˢᵗ Century who routinely time-travels to steal expensive technology from the future and return it to the past for retroinvention. The profits from this pay all the Gormogons’ bills, including subsidizing this website. Some of the products he has introduced from the future include oven mitts, the Guinness widget, Oxy-Clean, and Dr. Pepper. Due to his immense cybernetic brain, GorT is able to produce a post in 0.023 seconds and research it in even less time. Only ’Puter spends less time on research. GorT speaks entirely in zeros and ones, but occasionally throws in a ڭ to annoy the Volgi. He is a massive proponent of science, technology, and energy development, and enjoys nothing more than taking the Czar’s more interesting scientific theories, going into the past, publishing them as his own, and then returning to take credit for them. He is the only Gormogon who is capable of doing math. Possessed of incredible strength, he understands the awesome responsibility that follows and only uses it to hurt people.