‘Puter, like the rest of America, watched the Left and its media comfort women reduced to incoherent sputtering over the last week. Confronted with the Gun Control Failure story, the Boston (Marathon) Massacre story, the Elvis Impersonator Mails Ricin to Obama story and the West, Texas Fertilizer Plant Explosion story, the media struggled.

Yes, media liberals, evil does in fact exist, and no amount of denial, no matter how convincingly delivered, will change that fact or save your beloved, yet failed, quasi-religious ideology.

The Left’s round-heeled media enablers struggled to present accurate and verified facts, engaging in a zany, madcap race to the ethical and professional bottom. The media intermittently punctuated its spittle-flecked newsroom jihad with strange and chilling Tourette’s-like staccato outbursts of shameful antipathy towards the Right. By now, we on the Right have grown accustomed to media bias, but even in our desensitized state, we noticed something had changed.  Something big. We could see it in the forced smiles and darting eyes of our media elites.  Something had gotten to them. But what?

If you could tolerate the endless hours of self-imposed beclowning and ever more hostile asshatery, you’d have noticed something missing from the media’s narrative.

For well over a week now, obscured by liberal talking heads’ never-ending torrent of self-righteous, self-aggrandizing calls for political correctness, the Left and its lapdog media struggled and failed to provide America an explanation, much less a coherent explanation, for the tragedies’ cause.

‘Puter wondered why the media couldn’t see what was so obvious to ‘Puter and to much of Flyover ‘Murrica: the tragedies’ unifying causative element is evil.  Sometimes we can plainly identify evil, as in the Newtown Slaughter, the Boston (Marathon) Massacre and the Elvis-Cum-Terrorist Ricin-ator.  Sometimes evil things just happen, with no apparent malefactor, as in the leveling of nearly half of West, Texas. But evil is always there, hidden in the shadows, but easy to find if one knows where to look.

And so ‘Puter set about drinking and thinking this weekend, pondering the Left’s newly found exception to its ceaseless “root cause” analysis. What is it about evil, anyway, that makes the Left’s faces blanch whiter than Sen. Robert Byrd’s (D-WV) Klan robes?

This morning, ‘Puter read John Hinderaker’s post at Powerline, aptly titled “Why Does Evil Make Liberals Stupid?” It’s a good post. A tour de force takedown of liberal lunacy rearing its head at that once-august publication The Atlantic. And in the middle of Mr. Hinderaker’s excoriation, it struck ‘Puter.

Evil doesn’t make liberals stupid.  Evil terrifies liberals. It’s the terror that we saw on display last week, continuing into this week. The Left’s increasingly irrational and violent rhetoric isn’t part of some master plan to destroy conservatism, it’s a visceral reaction to abject terror liberals are experiencing as the world they thought they knew collapses before their eyes.

Let ‘Puter expound a bit. Evil terrifies liberals not because of the mayhem, madness and murders too frequently found in proximity to evil.  Mass slaughter doesn’t generally bother liberals, at least not when used in service of advancing the Left’s power.  See, e.g., Stalin’s Russia, Hitler’s Germany, Pol Pot’s Cambodia, Mao’s China, Castro’s Cuba, etc.  Why should the slaughter of such a small by comparison number of lives bother the Left?  Why are these massacres different from all others?

These tragedies are different because liberals cannot avoid facing the evil.  Liberals traditionally change topics or switch blame when confronted with their political tradition’s bloody history. You’ll hear them say that Hitler was conservative.  He wasn’t. Or that the Georgians Stalin slaughtered had it coming because they were anti-government. They didn’t and they weren’t. Or that Mao’s mass killings were justified because China had been oppressed by corrupt capitalists, and Mao’s communism ultimately advanced the station of your average Chinese. It wasn’t justified, and it didn’t advance crap.

But last week’s events were different.  Liberals found they couldn’t ignore evil’s existence. America saw evil’s razor sharp scythe mow down unsuspecting Americans live and in color.  We saw evil’s twisted existence in all its vibrant, technicolor horror. Once America saw incontrovertible proof of evil, we couldn’t unsee it. And because we saw it with our own two eyes, media quickly realized its old parlor tricks wouldn’t work this time, not on America and not on themselves.

Liberals viscerally fear evil because evil invalidates modern American liberalism.  If evil exists, then the modern American liberalism’s entire political agenda must fail.

Think about it. What’s modern American liberalism’s guiding principle?

It’s this: a well-intentioned and all powerful government’s (conveniently run by liberals) application of human knowledge, reason and order (conveniently defined as whatever liberals believe on any given day) cannot only determine the root causes of problems, but ultimately solve every problem mankind has ever encountered or will encounter in the future.

A gigantic, liberal-run government with unlimited access to taxpayer dollars and unfettered by individual rights and our Constitution, can solve all of America’s problems.  If liberalism’s not succeeding, it’s because someone (conservatives) doesn’t care enough, or pay enough or kowtow enough.  The fault never lies with liberal-run government. The fault always lies with selfish Americans. Sound familiar?

But evil has no root cause to be noodled out.  Evil is. Evil exists.  Always has, always will.  There’s no explanation for evil, no root cause. At least none that mankind will ever know. And if there’s no explanation or root cause, there’s no solution to evil.  The existence of evil in and of itself puts the lie to liberalism.  Evil’s existence shows modern American liberalism for the self-centered, egotistical and dangerously hubristic fantasy it is. We cannot know and conquer evil because evil is,w as and ever shall be part and parcel of the human condition, a part each of us struggles mightily against.

In every religious narrative, regardless of tradition, and throughout all of history, mankind and evil have coexisted. Evil’s always there, lurking, waiting for its opportunity. Whatever name  or form evil adopts, whether Satan or Shiva or mental illness or cancer, evil does not change. Evil is timeless, immutable, and worst of all for liberals and liberalism, insoluble.

Evil has always been with mankind, and will remain with us until the end of time. Evil will remain with us no matter how smart we are, or how dedicated we are, or how many genius regulatory schemes we come up with. Evil cannot be beaten by man, merely anticipated.  We attack evil when encountered, temporarily defeat evil when we are able and we avoid evil when nothing else works.

Modern American liberalism’s dogma cannot be squared with evil.  If there’s an insoluble problem, then it cannot be true that government run by really, really smart liberals can solve every problem, as liberals profess.  If there’s an insoluble problem, liberalism’s morally superior call for citizens to turn over their freedom to an omnipotent and omniscient central federal government fails as well.

If liberals admit evil’s existence, liberalism will be revealed as the naked emperor for all to see and to mock. And rightly so.

So, ‘Puter’s shown that liberalism cannot coexist with evil. And this, friends, explains everything we witnessed from our liberal betters in the past week.

The Toomey-Manchin expanded background check for gun sales legislation wouldn’t have stopped the Newtown Slaughter. It also wouldn’t have stopped the Boston Bombers from getting handguns. It wouldn’t have stopped the Aurora shooter, nor would it have stopped the Fort Hood shootings. No gun control law would’ve stopped any of these horrors because no law will stop evil people from slaughtering innocents. Evil exists in spite of liberals’ enacted bans. Heck, “Thou Shalt Not Kill” is one of the danged Ten Commandments, given by God to man, and we still kill one another regularly. To admit that laws cannot solve every problem is to admit liberalism’s failure. Hence, the over-the-top reaction from liberals impugning the humanity, intellect and patriotism of gun control opponents.

Similarly, the Left went ape-sh!t when Americans dared mention the Boston Bombers and the lesser mentioned Elvis Ricin Mailer were in the thrall of evil. The media went into rage-filled, reason-free paroxysms defending their liberal faith from evil’s rebuking, mocking falsification. The Left projectile vomited every explanation they could conceive to explain these murderous rampages. Every explanation except the correct explanations: evil in the guise of radical Islamism and mental illness had overcome these men. 

The media forfeited any remaining shred of credibility it had, explaining to onlooking Americans that we were too stupid to understand what was really going on.  There’s no evil, no sirree! Media told us it was all America’s fault.  America was too mean to these nice, poor Chechen immigrants. Benighted, bigoted Americans don’t understand Islam is a religion of peace, despite ample evidence to the contrary. Stupid Americans are racists, fearing brown skinned people who speak broken English with a funny accent.

The only explanation too unthinkable to slip off the Left’s tongues was the only correct one: these men succumbed to evil.

To the Left, failure to explain the inexplicable dooms their entire cognitive framework.  As such, we’re witnessing otherwise intelligent men and women reduced to name-calling, scapegoating, and slandering/libeling anyone who dare name evil as the root cause. To liberalism’s worshippers, any act taken to preserve the liberal worldview is tolerable, no matter how horrible.  The ends justify the means, no matter who gets hurt in the process.

But just wait.  The Left’s abhorrent behavior over the last week is only going to get worse as it descends further into madness, raging against the coming end of their failed dogma. We are witnessing a collective nervous breakdown on the Left as they slowly realize their cherished beliefs are based on lies told by men seeking power, and nothing more.

There is hope, though.  It’s dawning on many smarter Lefties that the gig is up, their liberal world view is discredited. We can see it in their eyes. The fear that maybe, just maybe, those morons on the Right were correct.  Maybe evil does exist. And one they admit evil exists, modern American liberalism as a coherent political philosophy must fail of necessity.

The only remaining question is how much damage must our country suffer before the inevitable comes to pass, as the Left oscillates between unleashing vicious attacks and engaging in weepy, public self-analysis .

Hang on to your hats, ladies and gentlemen. It’s going to be an interesting ride.

'Puter

Always right, unless he isn’t, the infallible Ghettoputer F. X. Gormogons claims to be an in-law of the Volgi, although no one really believes this.

’Puter carefully follows economic and financial trends, legal affairs, and serves as the Gormogons’ financial and legal advisor. He successfully defended us against a lawsuit from a liquor distributor worth hundreds of thousands of dollars in unpaid deliveries of bootleg shandies.

The Geep has an IQ so high it is untestable and attempts to measure it have resulted in dangerously unstable results as well as injuries to researchers. Coincidentally, he publishes intelligence tests as a side gig.

His sarcasm is so highly developed it borders on the psychic, and he is often able to insult a person even before meeting them. ’Puter enjoys hunting small game with 000 slugs and punt guns, correcting homilies in real time at Mass, and undermining unions. ’Puter likes to wear a hockey mask and carry an axe into public campgrounds, where he bursts into people’s tents and screams. As you might expect, he has been shot several times but remains completely undeterred.

He assures us that his obsessive fawning over news stories involving women teachers sleeping with young students is not Freudian in any way, although he admits something similar once happened to him. Uniquely, ’Puter is unable to speak, read, or write Russian, but he is able to sing it fluently.

Geep joined the order in the mid-1980s. He arrived at the Castle door with dozens of steamer trunks and an inarticulate hissing creature of astonishingly low intelligence he calls “Sleestak.” Ghettoputer appears to make his wishes known to Sleestak, although no one is sure whether this is the result of complex sign language, expert body posture reading, or simply beating Sleestak with a rubber mallet.

‘Puter suggests the Czar suck it.