Epistles to the Czar
The Czar writes a nice little something, expects that he will receive angry letters about it, but typically gets richly thought-out responses by really smart people. Case in point: the Czar wrote a feel-bad piece about whether Protestants are really protesting against Catholicism anymore, and figured he would hear from folks angry with his simplistic explanations. Instead, we found two nice Dear Czar letters worth sharing. The first is from Mitch, who is the proud owner and operator of Blogfonte:
| I think you’re over-emphasizing the role of sectarian descent in determining whether a given church is Protestant or not. The Methodists believe themselves to be following the original doctrine and faith of the church catholic as much as do the Jehovah’s Witnesses and the Mormons and so forth. Sola scriptura means exactly that – no authority but that of scripture and the church thereby established. As I understand it, there’s usually a distinction between doctrine and discipline – thus all those Methodist bishops and Presbyterian synods and so forth – but still, sola scriptura. What makes the Mormons definitely not Protestant, in point of fact, is that they aren’t really sola scriptura – not only do they have an additional testament in the Book of Mormon – as well as whatever you want to call the Pearl of Great Price – but they also have a doctrine of ongoing prophecy. New scripture, and ongoing prophecy – those are both kind of the nec plus ultra of Protestantism. That, and maybe rejection of trinitarianism. I mean, heck, the Unitarians are a direct descendant of the Congregational branch of Calvinism, but they aren’t really Protestant any more. In fact, I’m not exactly sure how to characterize them now – sort of a freemasonry for members of the New Class, except you don’t actually have to believe in God to belong? A spiritually-themed clubhouse for postmodern, cultural Puritans? The Witnesses seem to be an extreme example of the typical founding of a sect from Protestant-milieu bible study gone off the rails. In the case of the Bible Student movement, which eventually produced the Witnesses, it looks like yet more fallout from the Millerites and Seventh Day Adventists. Of course, you can say the same of the Baha’i, so that and twelve shekels will get you a cappuccino in Haifa, as nobody characterizes them as Christian, let alone Protestant. The great hilarity of Protestantism and sola scriptura is its tendency, in moments of radical ferment, to shed sects like dandruff all over the landscape. The Millerites, the Mormons, and a swarm of other wild-eyed prophets and schismatics came out of the same stretch of doctrinal craziness along the Erie Canal in the 1830s, the Second Great Awakening’s heart of darkness, the fabled “Burned-over District”. Same thing happened in England in the 1650s, which produced the Quakers, Baptists, and a swarm of mayfly sects that didn’t pass the test of time. The Tudor-era Church of England kept going back and forth over whether the common folk should be studying the bible, if only because such bible-study had a distressing (to the Episcopals and royals) tendency to produce un-nerving wildcat churches run by mechanics and women prophets and the like. |
And if that were not enough to perk up your gray bits this morning, Operative SMR adds a different perspective:
| Dear The Czar, As a Catholic in the Bible Belt, I’ve enjoyed ample opportunity to discuss theological derivation with a number of Protestants of various stripes – oddly, usually at track meets. The interesting thing to me is how many of them seem now to claim that their particular denomination predated the Catholic Church. There seem to be a number of Baptist variations* that claim this as well as a number of other denominations whose names I can never keep straight. I surely am thankful for the Magisterium. Your faithful minion, *I’m not certain what word they prefer to distinguish their individual churches from others. Denomination seems to imply “one among many” when one would think they, like the Witnesses, think theirs is the one true way. |
The Czar will add that pretty much every religion understands itself to be the best, otherwise recruiting for that branch, sect, denomination, or faith would be way down. Imagine: “Come to the United Fellowship of Christ Believers—We’re Almost As Real As Presbyterians!” That sure wouldn’t work. But you are correct in that searching for a single word that collects all those terms into one is tricky, so how about “bunch?” Mark Spahn—he of West Seneca, New York—will soon write in with the bon mot, which will trigger an email to us from Volgi pointing out some obscure 11th Century error, and the whole fight starts again, and pretty soon the Baptists produce a 453rd split, the Episcopalians appoint a non-Episcopalian as a bishop in an effort to branch out, and the media will gleefully announce that Pope Francis has legalized premarital sex. The usual, one guesses.
Божію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, and was cheated out of total control of all Russia upon the death of Boris Mikhailovich, who replaced Alexander Yaroslav Nevsky in 1263. However, in 1283, our Czar was passed over due to a clerical error and the rule of all Russia went to his second cousin Daniil (Даниил Александрович), whom Czar still resents. As a half-hearted apology, the Czar was awarded control over Muscovy, inconveniently located 5,000 miles away just outside Chicago. He now spends his time seething about this and writing about other stuff that bothers him.