Божію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, and was cheated out of total control of all Russia upon the death of Boris Mikhailovich, who replaced Alexander Yaroslav Nevsky in 1263. However, in 1283, our Czar was passed over due to a clerical error and the rule of all Russia went to his second cousin Daniil (Даниил Александрович), whom Czar still resents. As a half-hearted apology, the Czar was awarded control over Muscovy, inconveniently located 5,000 miles away just outside Chicago. He now spends his time seething about this and writing about other stuff that bothers him.
Although the MSM has been covering it, and making it an upper-importance story, you still might have missed that yesterday Secretary of State Clinton took full responsibility for the failure of security at the Benghazi safe house. Not Egypt or … Continue reading →
Sometimes things almost take care of themselves. You might remember the Czar complaining yesterday about one of his 46 college roommates showing up for the first time since 1922, trashing the inside and outside of the Castle, demanding to see … Continue reading →
Ever have that one guy you just cannot stand pop back into your life? The Czar has his, all right. Guess who showed up? Our old college roommate, back when we attended the Marine Academy of St. Petersburg together. Figures … Continue reading →
Good Lord, why did the Czar enjoy this so much? Maybe because SNL is starting to pay attention? Also, it looks like Romney/Ryan picks up critical and surprising live endorsement at the end. The Czar of MuscovyБожію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, … Continue reading →
It has been a while since the Czar got a compliment. Not that we are fishing, but just setting your expectations at how welcome this email from Operative JS is: Dear his august majesty el czar, Thank you (and the … Continue reading →
Let us see how good you are at playing this game. A single bullet was fired into the Denver headquarters of Barack Obama’s campaign; thankfully, no one was hurt, but a window was shattered. You already know how the press … Continue reading →
Now that the dust has settled around the debate, let us see what is worth seeing. Biden responding to the death of Ambassador Stevens, the third straight month of economic slowdown, high unemployment numbers, Iran destroying Israel with a nuclear … Continue reading →
The Czar has not even read the news yet to see what immediate reactions were from a broad range of observers. Paul Ryan performed as expected: he was relaxed, cool—for the most part, although his Irish dander got up twice—and … Continue reading →
A nice Polish lady got to conversing with us the other day, and asked if we had heard anything about Obamacare taxing people selling their homes, starting in 2013. Would this not, she suspected, severely damage home sales just when … Continue reading →
How bad is it? So bad that people are spending their own money to take down Obama. His statements echo a recent European immigrant who spoke with us: she came from a socialist country, and she was there long enough … Continue reading →
A lot of weird stuff is coming to light about the Benghazi attacks. By now, we have already established what happened, down to which room the Ambassador was hiding in, and how he was forced out with fire. This is … Continue reading →
Well, curiosities abound. The Obama campaign seems to have an internal bit of chaos going on. Inside reports (which may have been deliberately leaked to the press) indicate that the President was a tad…oblivious, perhaps?…to the debate fallout. Basically, the … Continue reading →
Well, even the far-left Pew Research has concluded that Mitt Romney won the debate with change to spare. Did we read correctly that undecided voters are leaning toward Romney 72-16 based on the debate? Worse news for the Obama campaign: … Continue reading →
Sometimes it is not good to be the Czar. For example, he is helping his sainted mother translate some paperwork from her father, and needless to say, penmanship was pretty bad in that century. One can hardly tell a ѣ … Continue reading →
Perhaps the Doc would like to comment, but when seven people die from a form of meningitis allegedly linked to contaminated steroids, you really cannot promote that as an outbreak. Yet the Media is all excited, and wants you to … Continue reading →
During the debate, President Obama crowed that he did not raise taxes on 97% of small business owners. Mitt Romney explained to him, to the Presidents obvious discomfort, that the 3% who suffered the tax hike actually are responsible for … Continue reading →
Operative DT writes in: Oh Hirsute One, I apologize for my infrequent updates. The myrmidons are coming along well, though your suggested airborn/air assault/ballet cross-training has them a bit perplexed. Thankfully they’re only allowed to think on Tuesdays between 21:00 … Continue reading →
Now that the shock has worn off for many Americans that Mitt Romney is indeed a competent, commanding fellow, the Czar thought he would step back and look at the reaction to the debate. One reviewer felt that Mitt Romney … Continue reading →
The Czar won’t waste your time recapping the debate point by point; neither Obama nor Romney said anything new or startling. The questions were allegedly all about domestic policy, unemployment, taxes, healthcare, and the role of government in a citizen’s … Continue reading →
Operative DM points out that tornadoes can do weird things, like put straw through trees and stuff. What are the weirdest things we’ve seen tornadoes do? Well, in no particular order, here are some of the incredible things a tornado … Continue reading →
The Czar had an interesting exchange yesterday afternoon. A self-described Democrat was complaining to us about Obamacare, and how four of her friends were let go from a hospital because of new changes in the law. The Czar was not … Continue reading →
Oh yeah, they have a solution for you, all right. Here’s a new meme. Or rather, a really old meme being given a new application. As you may have heard, there is a neo-Nazi-like political party in Greece ascending in … Continue reading →
Our royal archivist, MBernadetteE, came up from the Castle basement the Friday morning, which was a source of great relief because nobody has seen her for three weeks. If you didn’t know, she has been diligently archiving, indexing, and filing … Continue reading →
People want to know how we’re going to vote…run! Mitch H., proud owner and operator of Blogfonte, sung by the Castle and had a barside chat with us on the Czar’s wonderful piece on the weirdness of recent polls. The … Continue reading →
Shut up and eat your food. Or no more SmartBoards. In 1946, the Truman administration—as part of the Progressive Health, Education, and Welfare trifecta— began the national school lunch program (NSLP). In 1966, LBJ extended that to include breakfasts as … Continue reading →
The Czar must say he is quite confused by the media on this election. Okay, there are so many stories “correcting” the polls that there is no point in providing a link to one of them. By and large, you … Continue reading →
Mr. Philippe Reines, who evidently has no idea how to manage himself, let alone the media. No, you didn’t elect him. The news about the Libyan attack keeps getting worse. The Czar was particularly troubled at an emerging story that … Continue reading →
Could Romney be planning a major policy dump during the debates? Wow, that might be a great idea, if he is conniving enough. Just a thought. Democrats and an increasing number of Republicans have been pressing Mitt Romney to release … Continue reading →
Hast thou heard of this yet? At a petting zoo, a baby goat falls into a pond. It panics, and begins to drown. Before the people can react, the goat is saved—by a most unlikely assistant. Watch and be amazed. … Continue reading →
Hey GorT, Remember when you let those whackjobs from 2113 borrow your time machine, because they wanted to go back to a simpler time and live out a nice pastoral utopia? Guess who just turned up? Explains why they never … Continue reading →
The other day, the Czar opined a bit on the poll numbers seem stagnant. Other media outlets are similarly realizing that the poll numbers might not have much to do with what either Obama or Romney are saying. Other outlets … Continue reading →
That headline seems so strange, but put Mitt Romney’s name in there, and everyone agrees with it. Yet, for months now, the President and Mitt Romney have been in a statistical tie for the most part. We keep hearing that … Continue reading →
Remember a couple of days ago when the Czar was really annoyed with the Main Stream Media, and how this was the beginning of the end? One of us, probably Volgi (because he often forgets to sign his tweets), tweeted … Continue reading →
The Mandarin is releasing some more of his weird experiments on animals. Note for the squeamish: this is almost two minutes long, but the minute oughta give you a sense of the whole thing. The Czar of MuscovyБожію Поспѣшествующею Милостію … Continue reading →
Know who really had a bad week? “Today, Mitt Romney admitted to ThoughtCrime against our great and glorious supreme leader, who forgave Romney in all his benevolence. Also, we’re getting the poop sued out of us.” Not Barack Obama, who … Continue reading →
The great and powerful Eric Reasons send us a fantastic link by tying it to a dead ptarmigan and tossing it our way through the Castle window (which was closed): Thought I’d toss this your way after your excellent rant … Continue reading →
Both liberals and conservatives need to get over themselves with the events of September 11, 2012, and focus on what actually happened. Not surprisingly, each needs to get over something different; even less surprisingly, the Czar has plenty of advice … Continue reading →
The President cannot claim any real superiority in foreign policy; as recent events show, foreign crises are irritating things that seem to serve no other purpose than to interrupt his fund raising. What the heck are Libya and Egypt thinking? … Continue reading →
And so Chicago Mayor Rahm Emanuel is living large, now that he has bested the Chicago Teachers’ Union. Right? Well, not quite. Although the backlash against the teachers has been intense, the first major test of his ability to restore … Continue reading →
The Czar finds it meaningful, at least in a self-indulgent way, that he never tires of hearing “where were you” stories about September 11, 2001. Unlike the Kennedy assassination for the Baby Boomers, who managed to turn that all about … Continue reading →
The Czar cannot promise that all aspects of Chicago Public School (CPS) politics will be very interesting, but today’s CPS strike is intensely fascinating if largely inside baseball. Here is our assessment. Never let a crisis go to waste, even … Continue reading →
Just as not all liberals are unwashed Occupy protesters (in fact, based on their turnouts, almost no one is an Occupy protester at all), nor do all liberals hate the troops, nor are all liberals against financial reform…well, frankly, these … Continue reading →
Uh-oh! The Los Angeles Times has a science article written by Louis Sahagun, who appears to be in junior high school. Success! You found liquid water in the steam of your laser! Now shut down, before you uncontrollably use your … Continue reading →
Didja know that President Obama and Mitt Romney already had their first debate? Yes, it was a science debate, which candidates responded to in writing. The Czar heard the Mitt Romney thumped the President pretty hard, so he went to … Continue reading →
Just some administrivia. We get lots of letters, and we try to respond to all of them. Because we do not have a Ron Paul 2012 comments section, an email is the best way to get hold of us. We … Continue reading →
The Czar won’t lie to you. He loves to see more and more mounting evidence that Bill Clinton made up enormous parts of his speech against the evil Republicans the other night. Not that the Czar is defending anything Clinton … Continue reading →
Muscovy announced a contest some weeks ago asking every kid to write in why his or her dog is the best dog in Muscovy. Winners would receive a special prize. Sally still prefers to hide under anything she can. To … Continue reading →
Now, you understand, this is not the Volgi singing. It is, however, Roy Wood. And it gives you a weird idea of why Volgi would never do his own rock video. The Czar of MuscovyБожію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный … Continue reading →
President Clinton’s speech was very odd. On paper, it served to accomplish two goals—to say that Barack Obama is a really nice guy, and that Republican criticisms of his presidency have been a little extreme compared to the GOP Bill … Continue reading →
Bongburgher, the veritable Burgher of Bong, writes in: Your Awfulness, For the record, I do not belong to the government. My wife and children do not belong to the government. Neither do my friends, neighbors, acquaintances, nor my worst enemies…. … Continue reading →
The Czar caught a fair bit of the Democratic National Convention last evening, and has some comments. First, fire the director. While the GOP director had a weird obsession with zooming in tight on other people with weird obsessions (“Hey, … Continue reading →
Man, you people get so needy. All right. By popular demand, we have added a second series of MiniFigures for your Castle Gormogon sets! Die-hard fans will be certain to gouge other people’s eyes out in order to get their … Continue reading →
Democrats begin their convention, and it might be worth watching just to see what Bill Clinton does during his speech. He has already threatened to wreck the convention if he didn’t get his way—and on his list of demands is … Continue reading →
Admit it! Wouldn’t you sometimes rather act out your own Gormogon posts, rather than read the ones we actually put here? Seriously, don’t you just want to go all ‘Puter on NPR once in a while? Or have the Czar … Continue reading →
The President. Sigh. Well, today, in response to scores of millions out of work and suffering, the President released his favorite beer recipes. Millions of Americans will now be back to work, you’ll see. And understanding the heartbreaking loss of … Continue reading →
First, let us review the topic: Thou most Dread and Awful – Fellow Operative BG’s list of successful, tax-cutting, budget-balancing governors reminds me of an old saw that seems to have gone dull from misuse: “You have never read a … Continue reading →
BG writes in. I’m sure I’m not the only one who noticed this. Tuesday night: Ohio Governor Kasich: We balanced our budget and we cut taxes. Wisconsin Governor Walker: We balanced our budget and we cut taxes. Virginia Governor McDonnell: … Continue reading →
The Czar and the Царица watched last night’s convention speeches, missing only a couple for dinner and homework with the kids. Thoughts: Portman: Too much a campaign speech, knocking the President around. Look, everyone there knows Obama is a dud. … Continue reading →
Here is a really easy way to tick off a pro-AGW enthusiast: tell him that this winter is expected to be the coldest on record, or that we haven’t had nearly the amount of hurricanes predicted. You then get a … Continue reading →
The Czar loves math as much as you don’t. Here are some fun facts to astonish and amaze your pets. The number four is the only number with as many letters as its quantity stipulates. Which is good, because if … Continue reading →
Turns out that James Naismith made eight pages of notes about the very first game of basketball. You can read a transcript of them, as well. The Czar particularly liked this paragraph: Of course, should basketball ever accept a three-point … Continue reading →
You know, it isn’t just ‘Puter who can post tasteless crap like this. This is severely unfunny. Not a redeeming thing about this at all. Total immaturity, and exploiting the last socially tolerated form of gross prejudice: making fun of … Continue reading →
Lost amid the babble of election predictions? No kidding. Polls are not coming out fast and furious every day that show Mitt Romney ahead by one. Or Barack Obama by two. Or Mitt Romney by three, with an error margin … Continue reading →
The Czar has a surprising experience the other day. He had the luck to strike a casual conversation with a total stranger—a 20-year-old nursing student. This makes her absolutely a Millennial, and the Czar would like to share some pieces … Continue reading →
The ever-intriguing Stanley Kurtz has a piece out there today about the increased polarization of the media; he suggests, in part, that the collapse of so-called independent reporting is a mixture of bad and good. Bad, for example, because now … Continue reading →
The Czar does not watch a lot of network television. So it was with some curiosity when the Царица called his attention to the Sunday morning network political interview shows. You know, it really doesn’t matter which one, because the … Continue reading →
Fantastic work by GorT on the statistical analysis of our writings. The Czar is bemused when looking at his own word cloud that “DON” appears there in the far right. To wear? A mafia figurehead? A Spanish lord? Ameche? Curious, … Continue reading →
Eh, the Czar is simply in this kind of mood. The sometimes SFW Feral Irishman found this video somewhere, and it has been decades since the Czar heard the song. And the Czar likes puppies, of course. The Czar of … Continue reading →
Conservatives want to abolish the EPA, probably because they hate the environment. Also, they support global warming cooling climate change… well whatever it is that makes ice melt at the poles because they hate polar bears. We know this because … Continue reading →
Remember good old Thad McCotter? He was a US Representative from Michigan who flirted dangerously long with running for President on the Republican ticket. Why, he was so good at running for President that he sorta forgot to run for … Continue reading →
The President keeps insisting that Mitt Romney is planning to raise taxes on the middle class, in order to provide for a tax cut for the rich. Why, he even dubbed his challenger Romney Hood, to much laughter. But Romney’s … Continue reading →
With all the excitement in the news—whatever story floats your particular navy—one little item seems to be overlooked by most American news stories and frankly, it ought to be way more covered than Miley Cyrus cutting her hair short. And … Continue reading →
Over the next couple of months (and beyond that, if we’re lucky), we will be hearing a lot about the Paul Ryan plan. Formally known as the Path to Prosperity, the plan is intended to correct the certain-death spending of … Continue reading →
..is all we are saying. The Czar of MuscovyБожію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, and was cheated out of total control of all … Continue reading →
The Czar will admit when he is wrong, and he was sure wrong to have predicted Rob Portman as Romney’s eventual running mate. But the Czar had that tip on good authority, and now knows that his authorities are not … Continue reading →
It is sort of inevitable. Don’t say you didn’t roll your eyes a little. The Czar of MuscovyБожію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, … Continue reading →
Thank you for your attention. The Czar of MuscovyБожію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, and was cheated out of total control of all … Continue reading →
The Czar finds this shootback ad extremely effective for a lot of primal psychological reasons. It’s on YouTube, which means the more people click on it, the higher it ranks in popularity. Which means that more people will see it. … Continue reading →
Anyway, here you get a photo from Curiosity on Mars you won’t be seeing anywhere else. Nice work, Mandy! The Czar of MuscovyБожію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the … Continue reading →
A curious argument is starting to turn up in the wake of the Wisconsin shooting. Okay, some people are starting to acknowledge, there was no way to prevent a dirtbag like Wade Page from obtaining a firearm simply because there … Continue reading →
Harry Reid, 1974: Any man or woman who will not be completely candid about his or her finances does not deserve to be in public office. Senator Reid was asked about this on Monday. His response: In 1974, I wasn’t … Continue reading →
And so begins the media template. Stories on the Wisconsin shooting are already portraying the shooter as a nice, quiet guy who left the military in 1998. Quotes from people who knew him describe him as a neighbor who kept … Continue reading →
Esteemed Operative BG, who lately has been ensuring the African Rift Valley continues to rift at the right speed, took time away from that vital tectonic activity to write in: Awful and Awesome Czar – Hmmm… Reid says a Bain … Continue reading →
Like most Americans, the Czar are concerned about who Senator Harry Reid’s source is about why Mitt Romney refuses to release his taxes. Please allow a slight correction. No Americans think Harry Reid has any sources at all. Seriously, is … Continue reading →
Remember those days? The Czar of MuscovyБожію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, and was cheated out of total control of all Russia upon … Continue reading →
The Czar wrote a brief tweet yesterday evening that seemed to resonate with a lot of people. Rather than quote or repeat it, the Czar will simply restate it more formally. Chick-Fil-A apparently set a world record in fast food … Continue reading →
The Czar has deep seated rage, no sense of conscience, and a vast array of weaponry at his disposal, and yet even he dare not cross Ghettoputer. But. While ‘Puter is always right, the Czar would like to suggest that … Continue reading →
You know, the Czar has said for years that you will likely go your entire life without ever encountering a legitimately natural-forming quadratic equation. But to suggest that algebra itself is a time-wasting distraction is losing the baby with the … Continue reading →
Well, this is not entirely the Czar’s fault. The post clearly stated we were on vacation. You cannot expect us to update everything all the time. Dread and Awful (pun) Czar: I recently read in “Ur Seyentz 2Day” where researchers … Continue reading →
Dread Czar, Further to your discussion with Dr. J on opening ceremony nonsense, did you notice that when NBC showed banners from past Olympics, the two recent American games went down the memory hole? I noticed it in the TV … Continue reading →
Our beloved Dr. J. (who really is the nicest guy, provided he isnt’t electrocuting you with force lightning, in which case your opinion may fairly differ) grouses that the Olympics’ opening ceremony had a very pro-Leftist feel to them. The … Continue reading →
Since the Aurora, Colorado, shootings, gun sales are up nationally, either despite the media’s fear and terror about firearms, or because of the media’s fear and terror. Firearms are the media’s biggest bogeyman. And like all bogeymen, this fear is … Continue reading →
The Czar, family, and retinue has returned from a myriad purpose trip to Washington, DC, where the weather was superb (no rain while there). The Czar has been to DC innumerable times, but still has the odd spot of trouble … Continue reading →
Professional nice guy EC writes in: Your Czarness: As I recall their used to be a third and common form of bond: the metallic bond, in which the nuclei shared an electron cloud. Wikipedia seems to remember it also. Have … Continue reading →
The Czar is departing for a lengthy fact-finding trip with the whole Czar family (Царица, Царевич, and Цесаревич, too!) to Washington, DC, in hopes to discover what GorT does all day. As a result, it will indeed be a while … Continue reading →
Science writer George Dvorsky has a really fascinating and informative piece up at io9 cleverly titled “Intense Magnetic Fields Around White Dwarfs Reveal an Entirely New Class of Molecular Bonding,” in which he reviews how the incredible magnetic fields around … Continue reading →
People on all points of the political spectrum seem to find something off-putting about President Obama’s “you didn’t build that” gaffe—of all the smug, stupid, petty things he’s said, this one is—so far, anyway—the biggest jaw dropper. Many people of … Continue reading →
Seen this story from Gizmodo that the TSA is rolling out a secret new scanner that can completely detail everything about you from 164 feet away??!!!Eleven+y one111?? Not coming soon to every airport or street corner you can think of. … Continue reading →
This is a dumb little post, but the Czar cannot but help feel sorry for the word whom. People just do not use it like they used to; and by that we mean that people aren’t using it at all. … Continue reading →
