Aux armes, citoyens! [Updated]
Après le petit déjeuner! Belgium 1, France 0. Via Warming Glow. Update: Two more at Film Drunk. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →Category Archives: Humor
Madoff for the Masses
Just in case you didn’t see this on the Jimmy Kimmel show – here is Sesame Street’s explanation of the Bernie Madoff scandal. Mrs. GorT thought this would be appropriate for this site and I agree – I hope that … Continue reading →
So, what brings you here?
The following search terms, apparently. We hope everyone finds what he’s looking for, but we worry about many, many of you. how to make a muumuufat muumuupoland hates obama”round heels””rubbing together””steaming mug”airline whoresb vitamins what is a healthy dosebaby don’t … Continue reading →
Poor Jon Stewart
I know he and all the other late-night comics have been having the darnedest time finding good material on President Obama, because President Obama is so perfect. He never commits gaffes, and even if he did, he’d never suppress the … Continue reading →
Is Ghettoputer moonlighting as Ed Anger?
I’m madder than a leprechaun with a crooked shillelagh about St. Patrick’s Day! St. Patrick’s Day is the stupidest holiday of the year, because the Irish are the craziest people on earth, next to the Paleostynians and those nutcase A-rabs. … Continue reading →
Obey Me
OBEY The Czar is no fool. He views the Live Traffic stats down at the bottom of the blog, here. He sees that the most popular blog, world-wide, is Creepy Despots. He also know you like it only because it … Continue reading →
Chutch!
In the aspen covered Rockies there’s a legend often toldOf a tenured native shaman with a cougar, grey and goldHe had two fists of fury and a Master of Arts DegreeFrom accredited Sangamon State University CHORUSHe was a Colorado kung … Continue reading →
Yet Another Union to Watch
The International Astronomy Union declares February no longer a month, courtesy Bad Astronomy. Short and fun, unlike February, which tends to be only short. The Czar of MuscovyБожію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The … Continue reading →
Daylight Savings Time?
Clearly we need a Daylight Stimulus Time, says Mark Steyn. And, indeed, the Gormogons can report exclusively: “What I don’t think people should do is suddenly stuff photons in their mattresses and pull back completely from sunlight,” President Obama told … Continue reading →
We might have to make this guy a Gormogon
Because of his magnificent, “How Soccer is Ruining America: A Jeremiad.” Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →T. Coddington van Voorhees III returns!
With his unique brand of Republican analysis! During our Bermuda summit many gambits were proposed to win back America’s elite electoral precincts from the left; sponsoring various hip hop colloquia at the better Ivies, supporting integration of gays into Nascar, … Continue reading →
The Czar Rants on Bill Paying
Your Czar is not one to whine, Andy Rooney-like, about the inconveniences of modern living, but the Czar has just paid some bills, and since the Gormogons have seen fit to reward him with blog-like powers, the Czar shall use … Continue reading →
Jai ho…hey yo hey yo!
Glad they finally fixed this to restore the original soundtrack. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →Ghettoputer’s identity revealed?
Is he named Peter Ngyuen? Could be. Because this is clearly the background on Walt Whitman that informed his famous analysis of “When Lilacs Last in the Dooryard Bloomed.” AP English? Hell, yeah! Caption: Walt does not approve. Confucius, Œc. … Continue reading →
The Sub-Prime Community speaks
Memo to America’s Irresponsible Tea Party Whiners: STFU But through all of it, some of us persevered. We made the hard economic choices. We fought off eviction by keeping Linda Mustaine juiced up with mai tais at Applebee’s happy hour. … Continue reading →
Because I can’t stop watching it…
…you should suffer along with me. P.S. Welcome, Czar. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →The Czar Greets Yon Cossacks
The Czar of Muscovy is overwhelmed to accept such a glorious invitation to post here on the Gormogons website. This is quite a smart bunch, and your Czar is as humbled as one (gifted by the grace of God with … Continue reading →
I have an alibi.
Rock solid. Also, my Civic is a ’91. Otherwise, I take the Fifth. 本田技研工業株式会社!万歳!万歳!万歳! Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →Sometimes I wonder if we’re getting overexposed
More from the Czar: Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →The Czar’s Okhrana reports back with the following
Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →More reports from the hinterlands
The Czar submits yet more sightings of Gormogonical influence. (And we therefore reward him, a dog lover, with this link.) From Japan (you wouldn’t believe the stuff we’ve got going on there): Damn right: An’ from da grayder Chicawgolänt ärea: … Continue reading →
More from the Czar
Man, he’s good. Digging up the occult clues we leave everywhere. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →More evidence of our spreading the good word
Found at local parishes: and here… GorTGorT is an eight-foot-tall robot from the 51ˢᵗ Century who routinely time-travels to steal expensive technology from the future and return it to the past for retroinvention. The profits from this pay all the … Continue reading →
The tentacles of the Gormogons surface
The Czar has been driving around Muscovy painting icons. And, of course, this again. Oh yeah. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →Ghettoputer’s directing and starring in films?
Why didn’t you tell us, man? Via Film Drunk. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →Our D.C. homey.
Yeah, that guy’s all over. I once saw him playing cowbell for Rare Essence. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →READ THIS NOW.
NOW. NOW! Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →Russian parkour
Excuse the vulgar URL on screen. Via With Leather. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →People am stupid, Chapter 531
Via Buttle. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →Meanwhile the universe denies Ghettoputer…
…his dearest Christmas wish:Via Film Drunk. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →NICE!
This is a “great” “blog.” Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →Bawl more
As Washingtonians, the Gormogons are required to endorse—heartily—this beautiful piece of Baltimore-bashing by Mike “Christmas Ape” Tunison (of Silver Spring) over at KSK. While we all enjoy Old Bay on our fries, loved to watch Homicide, and at least one … Continue reading →
And now a public-service announcement
Courtesy of the Beast. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →Vocative particle, vocative particle, vocative particle!
Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →Amen!
More from Holy Taco here, including the First Church of Jesus Christ, Greatest American Hero: Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →As HMS Britannia goes down…
…the country’s wits shout defiance from the deck: Via Kathy Shaidle. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →Sloths!
This is for Ghettoputer: And the sequel, just for fun: Via Film Drunk. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →To keep you laughing…
…in these too-humorless times, here’s a terrific piece by Paul Johnson. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →And now a public-service announcement
Via Dirty Harry. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →More McCain Hollywood ads
The Juno crew, David Lynch, and Manoj Nelliyattu Shyamalan. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →Nice McCain satire
Lest we get too humorless in the face of, well, whatever we’re in the face of, here’s a very funny satire of what pro-McCain ads commissioned by a desperate campaign from three famous directors would look like. Watch all three. … Continue reading →