The New York Times yesterday published an editorial stating that The Hon. Vaughn Walker should not have recused himself from consideration of California’s Proposition 8. Judge Walker is the U.S. District Court Judge who ruled that California’s Proposition 8 (banning … Continue reading →
As Czar knows from his extensive time spent piloting Mi-28 Havocs in tank busting missions north of the Arctic Circle*, it’s never a good idea to grab a crew member’s “genital area.” Your Gormogons made extra-certain to give this travel … Continue reading →
As regular readers know, ‘Puter and GorT both enjoy high-level European soccer. Last night, Real Madrid won the Copa del Rey, awarded annually in La Liga to the team that wins an elimination tournament. Real Madrid is one of the … Continue reading →
Seriously…..circuits…on…overload…too…many….jokes Naked Man Shoots SWAT Robot With AK-47 GorTGorT is an eight-foot-tall robot from the 51ˢᵗ Century who routinely time-travels to steal expensive technology from the future and return it to the past for retroinvention. The profits from this pay … Continue reading →
The Washington Post breathlessly reports this morning that a government shutdown may require non-essential federal employees to surrender their Blackberries on Monday. Federal employees may go throught withdrawal! OH NOES! All of this raises the following question in ‘Puter’s feeble … Continue reading →
Byron York writing in today’s Washington Examiner pens this column, excoriating AFL-CIO head honcho Richard Trumka for equating unions’ lavish benefit packages to Blacks’ struggle for civil rights. You ought to read the entire column. It is patently offensive that … Continue reading →
…and entraps people with her pals smiling, Cartman, and Joe Cool Apparently. In La Crosse.. GorTGorT is an eight-foot-tall robot from the 51ˢᵗ Century who routinely time-travels to steal expensive technology from the future and return it to the past … Continue reading →
There is an entertaining read out there about a guy who buys a television at Wal-Mart, and refuses to show his receipt to the guy at the exit because local state law says he does not have to. The Czar … Continue reading →
Here’s ‘Puter’s update to this post, as promised. ‘Puter had intended to merely post an update to his earlier post, but in re-reading the letter, ‘Puter decided it required a post of its own. The letter’s author is Mr. Bill … Continue reading →
*** WARNING: GRAPHIC LANGUAGE. SERIOUSLY. *** In this week’s issue of Time* (Mrs. ‘Puter subscribes. Don’t get ‘Puter started.), there’s a letter from a pro-union reader commenting on Time’s article on the Wisconsin public union showdown. The letter contains the … Continue reading →
Sometimes the Czar doesn’t even get a chance to become enraged. For example, the Czar found out recently that there was a movement afoot to release names of Illinois firearm identification holders to the public. Evidently, the Associated Press—for reasons … Continue reading →
Math is hard. At least it seems that way, as New York Times’ editors are either ignorant of basic math or lying. ‘Puter will politely assume that the editors are not liars, and will generously assume their ignorance instead. Today’s … Continue reading →
In a well-conceived plan to increase ‘Puter’s recently controlled blood pressure (thanks, HCTZ and lisinopril!) to the danger zone (‘Puter loves Top Gun), Your Volgi sends along this link regarding a hippie Catholic priest and his twist on the Rite … Continue reading →
Today’s New York Times breathlessly reports that: Edward N. Peters, a professor at Sacred Heart Major Seminary in Detroit, who last year was named by Pope Benedict XVI as a consultant to the Vatican court, the Apostolic Signatura, called the … Continue reading →
Gormogon Operative JS sent a coded message to ‘Puter utilizing as a cipher the number of purely gratuitious shots of Teri Hatcher’s rack on Desperate Housewives. JS writes: Have you chimed in yet about Unions and Wisconsin? I would’ve thought … Continue reading →
Dear Previous Owner of The Czar’s Royal Dacha, Whatever it is you are doing right now, stop it. Just stop. You are an idiot and have no idea what you are doing. To be fair, the Czar has prepared a … Continue reading →
Journalists, in an effort to infuriate the Czar ever more with incredible laziness, are playing a telephone game with a story about a planet way, way, way out around the Sun larger than Jupiter and quietly circling our sun. Not … Continue reading →
President Obama proposed his 2012 budget today. The New York Times predictably gushes in a so-called “news” story about the proposal’s “cut and invest” strategy. Meanwhile, House Republicans bravely proposed cutting nearly $100 billion out of the remaining budget for … Continue reading →
The answer according to Nicholas D. Kristof writing in today’s New York Times seems to be that Jesus would do whatever comports with Mr.Kristof’s liberal nostrums, regardless of what the Magisterium says. One of ‘Puter’s few conservative friends from college, … Continue reading →
We all knew it was coming. The White House indicates that President Obama will soon give a speech calling for greater gun control, ostensibly to prevent the recurrence of a Tucson style event. Newsweek, the Weekly Reader for putative adults, … Continue reading →
From: UBN Information Officer (fighterz—–0101@att.net)To: Mr. Czar MuscovyDate: January 21, 2011Subject: Attn: Valued CustomerWe write to bring to yournotice about your pendingpayment of 5.5 Million USD. Your pendingpayment is now confirmed by the UN and authorized for immediatewire transfer to … Continue reading →
‘Puter promised his additional thoughts on his Liberal Genius post below. In the interim, however, ‘Puter received this thoughtful response from Professor Mondo: Sorry you had another disagreement with your buddy — I have those with the Major all the … Continue reading →
And lo, the Czar hears that some white supremacist groups are protesting the upcoming Marvel movie Thor because, in the trailer, Norse gods are depicted as being multi-racial. What a stunning blow for Marvel, to lose the all-important opening weekend … Continue reading →
It’s not a new ABC reality show. It’s instead an all too real result of an unfortunate drunken brawl in Las Cruces, New Mexico. A guy, his wife and his mother get rip-roaring drunk, and — unexpectedly! — a 3:00 … Continue reading →
Last week a number of “celebrities” killed-off their digital selves on Twitter and Facebook as part of a fund raising drive for an HIV/AIDS relief organization that services Africa and India. The objective was to raise $1 million. Once the … Continue reading →
First, let’s be clear, I’m not advocating the demise of any person here but when I came across this tidbit on the news (courtesy of MTV): If you see headlines this Wednesday about Lady Gaga and Kim Kardashian giving up … Continue reading →
At least that’s what ‘Puter’s liberal friends all claim. You see, every single tea partier is an inbred, knuckle-dragging trogolodyte within an inch of resorting to utter, catastrophic violence to return America to the dark ages before President Clinton. Yet … Continue reading →
A gaggle of self-described patriotic millionaires are petitioning the government to raise taxes on all millionaires. Among these addle-pated high net worth individuals are well known hipster Moby and hippie Jerry Cohen (of Ben & Jerry’s ice cream fame). Moby … Continue reading →
Brought to you by your government, highlighted by Royal Physician Dr. J.: Dear Puter, Dr. J would like to wish our nation’s veterans a happy Veteran’s Day. Ironically, our nation’s VA hospitals are running on a weekend schedule today in … Continue reading →
Where are the most woo-woo places in the US? You know, the place where you get all funky with crystal healing, spiritual chakras, and so on? Los Angeles, right? San Francisco? Seattle, maybe? The Czar will shock and delight. His … Continue reading →
Let’s have a little fun playing compare and contrast: 1. Black employee makes statement described as racist. Employer takes quote out of context, goes off half-cocked, fires said employee without permitting employee an opportunity to explain. Employer realizes manifest error … Continue reading →
As a karate expert, ‘Puter would like to state that NPR is a perfect illustration of political correctness run amok. Aiding and abetting NPR in its fundamentalist jihad are leading “news” organizations such as the Washington Post and the New … Continue reading →
By now you’ve surely head about that horrific woman Ginny Thomas (Mrs. Clarence Thomas) calling Anita Hill and requesting that Professor Hill apologize. Apologize for what? Let ‘Puter take you back to his halcyon days in 1991 as a 1L … Continue reading →
A man, claiming he will be paid $1,000,000 for the stunt, streaked fully nude in front of President Obama. No, buddy, you got it exactly backward. It’s the emperor who has no clothes! The Czar of MuscovyБожію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, … Continue reading →
Oddly, ‘Puter finds a lot to like about Mayor Bloomberg’s jihad against food stamp recipients using taxpayer dollars to purchase soda. To be fair, ‘Puter first heard about this from Nanny State Advocate Number One Mika Brzezinski over at Morning … Continue reading →
‘Puter is a denizen of Upstate New York, and this year, upstart Tea Party/Republican candidate Carl Paladino is on the ballot. Mr. Paladino rose to stardom based primarily on his sharp invective and anger directed at New York’s entrenched political … Continue reading →
Arriving at a toy store near you, just in time for the Christmas shopping season, Justin Bieber action figures! If this isn’t the modern equivalent of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, or even a 50 Sta-Puft marshmallow man, ‘Puter … Continue reading →
Many have commented on this previously, yet it bears repeating. The Obama Administration is chock-full of left wing ideologues, bent on cramming their unpalatable agenda down America’s craw. Kevin Jennings, Obama’s “Safe Schools Czar” is one such nut job. ‘Puter … Continue reading →
SLEESTAK REPORTS GHETTOPUTER HAS BROKEN INTO THE MOTOR POOL. LAST SEEN TRAVELLING EASTBOUND ON I-675 NEAR MIAMI, OHIO. The guy lived. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →Yes, I’m diving back into the whole Climate Change/Global Warming/Global Cooling swirl. Specifically, while I agree the climate is changing (it’s changing all the time) I remain unconvinced that humans have had a significant impact on it. While in the … Continue reading →
Gormogon Operative Island Dweller comments via African coconut swallow on the Czar’s mosque post as follows: First – due to my (now former) government affiliation I was assigned to Hawaii for four years in the 1990s. Due to my job … Continue reading →
At least that’s the most fair read ‘Puter can give to this fact-challenged piece in Sunday’s Washington Post. Mr. Yglesias postulates that as a result of the economic downturn, Americans have embraced “illiberal populist nationalism,” careening headlong into xenophobia and … Continue reading →
Or simply a collection of the most willfully ignorant people on Earth? This is the question ‘Puter asks himself almost every time he reads a New York Times editorial. Here’s today’s whopper, pre-spinning Republican concerns over our bankrupt government entitlement … Continue reading →
Consumers Against Supermarket Privacy Invasion and Numbering (“CASPIN”), a group probably numering in the tens of tens, has its collective undies in a bunch over WalMart’s plan to track its inventory using RFID technology. Forgive ‘Puter’s skepticism, but he doubts … Continue reading →
If you could take everything that is wrong with “journalism” today, the vindictive liberal bias, the vapidity, the lock-step narrative, the in-the-tank-for-Obama-ness, roll it up into a sticky tar ball and form it into a single person, you’d have E.J. … Continue reading →
Check out this story. It’s got everything. White trash, firearms, toilet paper. One Mr. Pinnix shot his wife with a pistol loaded with toilet paper. As it was loaded with toilet paper, Ms. Pinnix was not seriously injured, sustaining only … Continue reading →
‘Puter works in a nondescript suburban corporate office park. His office building has two tenants: ‘Puter’s Employer, Inc. and Heartless Student Loan Debt Collection Corp. Today was HSLDCC’s corporate picnic. It was held in the parking lot. They had a … Continue reading →
The WaPo continues the lame expose series on the Intelligence Community and its workforce today. There is little to add (as it’s another 16 slides of the same stuff ‘Puter covered below) but I will dispute the following: The idea … Continue reading →
Keeping up a poisonous tradition, no good Protestant Northern Irishmen marched through predominantly Catholic neighborhoods in Belfast. As night follows day, the no good Prods were promptly set up by no good Papists hurling bricks, rocks and empty bottles. ‘Puter’s … Continue reading →
From ‘Puter’s ex, Megan McArdle, comes the following on l’affaire Gore from commenter winki. I wonder if Al bought rape credits from NOW to offset current and future sexual assaults. Win. In one simple sentence, winki slammed Gore for being … Continue reading →
With Mrs. ‘Puter. Usually, this sort of thing only happens when she has ladies’ night with the Czarina. Note to Sleestak. Replenish the bail fund. It’s getting low. 'PuterAlways right, unless he isn’t, the infallible Ghettoputer F. X. Gormogons claims … Continue reading →
According to Drudge, citing to The Star, former Vice President Al Gore has been involved in a two-year affair with Laurie David, self-proclaimed global warming activist and ex-wife of Seinfeld producer Larry David. Oh, and Ms. David also produced Mr. … Continue reading →
Little Green Footballs is doing excellent work in identifying photographs actively doctored by Reuters to hide evidence that the so-called peace activists actually had bladed weapons and were attacking Israeli commandos. Not once it seems, but at least twice. In … Continue reading →
The New York Times again beclowns itself. In an editorial today, it opines in support of a proposed law requiring all new semiautomatic handguns sold in New York to microstamp shell casings. Thus spake the editorial board: The microstamping process … Continue reading →
It’s a nice Friday afternoon in scenic Batavia, New York, located about halfway between Rochester and Buffalo. You’re out of work early, looking for fun. What do you do? Well, if you’re married 41 year old Suzanne M. Corona and … Continue reading →
The White House needs to remove Helen Thomas from the White House Press Corps. Yesterday. If the White House cannot, it should bar her from the press room, at a minimum. Ms. Thomas for whatever reason has determined that now … Continue reading →
On occasion, ‘Puter reads something so chock full o’ nuts, he is astonished. This morning’s New York Times presents just such an occasion. Timothy Egan manages to state with a straight face that the Millennial Generation, whose huge turnout helped … Continue reading →
…is your read of the week. I’m not even excerpting it, it’s so good. Read it entire and savor in the brutal, brilliant destruction of some useful idiot, fellow-traveller moron journalists’ fatuous, ignorant sucking up to the fascist Chinese regime. … Continue reading →
In Czar’s response to Gormogon operative FJR’s communique, located here, Czar invited ‘Puter to get mount his soapbox and vent about religion again. Czar asked for it, so here goes. FJR’s position on religion appears to be about the same … Continue reading →
Mr. Polanski, child rapist extraordinaire, is being held in Switzerland pending resolution the United States’ extradition request. For those who came in late, Mr. Polanski drugged and forcibly sodomized a 13 year old girl in Jack Nicholson’s California hot tub … Continue reading →
‘Puter’s been a bit miffed lately at the striking inability of supposedly well-educated individuals to form a quality argument. Here’s a few rules of thumb ‘Puter uses when arguing a point. Take these as you will. 1. Don’t present opinion … Continue reading →
In a stunning display of non sequitur, illogic and sheer, unadulterated ass-hattery, the New York Times editorial staff beclowned itself (again) today. The NYT published yet another tired anti-gun tirade, which is its right. However, this one is remarkable even … Continue reading →
The New York Times, along with most every other mainstream mediate outlet, rightly sings the praises of law enforcement and intelligence agencies in quickly capturing Faisal Shazad, the would-be Times Square bomber. ‘Puter seconds the accolades. However, in many ways, … Continue reading →
Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →Not one but two separate Gormogon Operatives pointed ‘Puter to the horrific Hello Kitty branding effort, pictured, right. What in the heck was Kotex’s marketing deaprtment thinking here? Nothing says comfort and absorption like strapping a kitty to your kitty? … Continue reading →
It’s an open secret that Elena Kagan, high on President Obama’s list for a Supreme Court appointment, is a lesbian. When blogger Ben Domenech commented that Ms. Kagan would be the first openly gay Supreme Court Justice, the White House … Continue reading →
The New York Times continues to display a stunning lack of basic economic knowledge. Today, the editorial board argues for giving bankruptcy judges the power to modify the terms and conditions of first mortgages, in the name of helping out … Continue reading →
‘Puter’s correspondent Uncle Jay (of Listen to Uncle Jay fame) forwarded a link to this New York Times story on ObamaCare’s implementation. In its haste to cram poorly drafted health care reform legislation down our throats, Congress inadvertently ordered itself … Continue reading →
In ‘Puter’s estimation, this post’s title is a more accurate descriptor of the New York Times‘ current journalistic standards than its stated motto. One need look no further than the NYT’s knowingly misleading coverage of the ongoing pedophilia scandal engulfing … Continue reading →
You think anyone explained to this broad what that cute little rainbow flag means? Update: Weathered Publius writes in: think the sign is meant to be ironic – IE. without the machine invented by a homosexual we would’ve lost WWII. … Continue reading →
There is so much wrong with this story ‘Puter doesn’t even no where to start. Morbidly obese Donna Simpson (weighing in at slightly more than 600 pounds) wants to be the world’s fattest woman. Ms. Simpson has set a goal … Continue reading →
Some people are too stupid to eat, or in Lindsay Lohan’s case, exist. ‘Puter is reminded of these incontrovertible facts upon perusal of the media this morning. First, the New York Times feels the duty to weigh in on a … Continue reading →
Of course, the Volgi’s favorite part is at 03:30. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →Mandarin stormed into ‘Puter’s rumpus room last evening looking for an escaped hybrid ocelot/macaque he’d engineered in one of his more whimsical moments. As ‘Puter helped the Mandarin corner and tranquilize the rabid beast, Mandarin mentioned that the remote operating … Continue reading →
President Obama’s Safe Schools Czar Kevin Jennings has, shall we say, colorful opinions. In 2000, Mr. Jennings spoke at a gathering that taught 14 year olds proper fisting* techniques, in the context of gay-lesbian-tranny-differently gendered-coprophiliac-child molester acceptance. Another seminar (tee … Continue reading →
It’s an article of faith among Obama-ites that everything bad that has occurred (and will occur)during President Obama’s presidency is ALL BUSHITLERCHENEYKKK’S FAULT!!1!! ZOMG!!! The sun rose in the east today (on the Mandarin’s command), and equally as predictably, the … Continue reading →
Everyone’s got one, and most of them stink. Thomas Frank writing in today’s WSJ opines thus: Defeat and economic disaster have only strengthened this impulse for blame evasion. Conservative economic doctrine, put into effect by conservatives in Congress and the … Continue reading →
…these crappy bootlegs back to the Castle. Oddly, we have two copies of this one, but upon inspection, the other one comes from Ghettoputer’s “special” collection, and the Gormogons aren’t about to risk prosecution in many countries (and civil suits … Continue reading →
A self-described “ninja” impaled himself on a fence in hippie-infested Seattle, thereby earning him a stealthy trip by ambulance to the nearest intensive care unit. Shockingly, police report the unidentified ninja (isn’t that always the case?) was “‘overconfident in his … Continue reading →
In this editorial, the Washington Post’s editorial board tars Republican candidate for Virginia Attorney General Kenneth Cuccinelli as a bigot. The WaPo takes umbrage at Mr. Cuccinelli’s assertion that homosexual acts are “intrinsically wrong” and represent “behavior that is not … Continue reading →
So rather than let GM crater in a richly deserved bankruptcy, the federal government (both Bush and Obama administrations) decided to bail out/buy out the Detroit automaker. Not content to bail out/buy out only one failed business model, the federal … Continue reading →
This summer, Iran detained three American hikers who allegedly strayed into Iran, accusing them of espionage. The hikers’ families just released a video they claim definitively shows the hikers could not have been spies. In the video shot a day … Continue reading →
It’s official. New York is the modern-day equivalent of 1930s Oklahoma, with its residents fleeing intolerable conditions for a better future in more hospitable climes. The crime of it all is that unlike Oklahoma in the 1930s, New York’s downfall … Continue reading →
If any reader is wondering how ‘Puter managed to haul his lazy rear end all the way to the Leaping Peacock (200 yards away from Castle Gormogon) in the first instance, look no further. Behold! ‘Puter’s sweet ride, borrowed from … Continue reading →
We need to clean out the dungeon, lay down some fresh straw and call the butcher shop. The Czar’s pet Oksana is coming home after her successful Central Asian tour. **’Puter meant to label the post “Stern Bears” but Volgi … Continue reading →
Today we learn that Megan Williams, who claimed under oath that she was kidnapped, brutally raped and tortured, made the entire story up. The story then tiptoes around the fact that the woman may be recanting because she is mentally … Continue reading →
To do what this distraught father did. ‘Puter can’t recall precisely how many times he’s exclaimed “Jeebus, ‘Puter, Jr. Did you really need to supersize that bucket of the Colonel’s finest? ‘Puter’s gonna need an icebreaker to clear this log … Continue reading →
Keep watching the skies for Orbital Mind-Control Lasers. (Also, don’t do ether, kids.) Via FilmDrunk. Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153
Continue reading →Diane Sawyer, ABC Evening News anchor-in-waiting, is married to Mike Nichols. “So what, ‘Puter?”, you may say. Well, Mike Nichols signed the recent Hollywood petition requesting Switzerland refuse to extradite confessed pedophile anal rapist Roman Polanski. Is it not appropriate … Continue reading →
You want to know how hard the Czar parties? This is how hard the Czar parties. How much more hard could the Czar party? None. None more hard. The rest of you are pikers. 'PuterAlways right, unless he isn’t, the … Continue reading →
Not all of you, and not literally. Well, maybe some of you, and literally, but you get ‘Puter’s point. Health care workers are screaming that their “rights” are being infringed. Anytime you hear a largely unionized workforce complaining about their … Continue reading →
Well, it took 31 years. Roman Polanski, wanted on an outstanding 1978 statutory rape charge, has consistently dodged American authorities by limiting his travel to countries that deny extradition to the US. He always insisted he was innocent—the 13 year … Continue reading →
A New York Times editorial takes the GOP to task for scaring the crap out of senior citizens. Thanks to the darn GOP, only 15% of Americans now think Medicare would be improved under the Obama plan. This is just … Continue reading →
We love the Church, but by and large, churchmen don’t understand a lick about economics. This results in foolishness not limited to—and usually much more catastrophic than—the mushy Christian-Democratic statist gunk the Czar was recently surprised to find in the … Continue reading →
What a rare treat New York has enjoyed today. In addition to having Ahmadî-Nezhâd smearing his own feces on every clean surface he can find, Manhattan was happy to treat Mu‘ammar al-Qaḏāfī, who now now appears rather much like Carlos … Continue reading →
‘Puter needs to confirm CNN’s amazing scientific climatological analysis with GorT and Czar, for the depth and breadth of CNN’s breakthrough is astonishing! CNN has discovered that when it rains a lot over a long period of time, it floods. … Continue reading →
‘Puter could’ve happily gone to his grave without hearing about this. What kind of sick &%$@ does something like this to his child? And what kind of sick &%$@ child then goes on to write about it for profit? And … Continue reading →
Especially on game day. First, a chucklehead defaces Leodis McKelvin’s lawn for fumbling away a sure win over New England last week. An excellent example of an “adult” reaction to a game. But with Buffalo (the city, not the team … Continue reading →
Two stories today on the Church, God save her from her churchmen. Stupid: CCHD has funnelled $7.3M to ACORN over the years. Apparently ended last year. Evil: Fêted Fairfield Prep grad sets up children’s charity in Haiti in order to … Continue reading →
