Gentle Readers, Dr. J. received this missive in his email today: Dr. J. scratched his head on this one because, he was of the understanding that pixels came from pixel mines in remote deserts such as the Jundland Wastes. Nevertheless … Continue reading →
Nothing like a little armored hellfire to spice up the games… Dr. J.
Continue reading →To: The Inscrutible Mandarin From: Dr. J. Re: Operation Snowdome Dear Mandy: The Orbiting Anti-Snow Ray works! New Atlantis remains snow-free! Suck it Atlanta! Best, Dr. J. Dr. J.
Continue reading →Did you catch the State of the Union last night? We didn’t! The truth is that your Gormogons found far better things to do with our Tuesday evening. The Volgi: I watched the Caps-Sabres game. ’Puter considers nothing sweeter than … Continue reading →
The prayer candle that Dr. J. lit for Lady and Loki J.’s breeder. Lady J. and Loki J.’ breeder suddenly fell ill this week with meningitis and is in the intensive care unit. He is critically ill and while it’s … Continue reading →
Click to make bigger. The Czar of MuscovyБожію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, and was cheated out of total control of all Russia … Continue reading →
College in the age of the 13th Imam, PBUH! Gentle Reader, The Czar, our self-styled merry prankster has gotten each of us more than once. The cherry in ‘Puter’s Manhattan, hilarious stuff! Dr. J., as an act of revenge, pranked … Continue reading →
Well, we Gormogons love infighting. Watching the playful shoving match between Dr. J., GorT, and Volgi over the metric system is a strong reminder to you readers that we Castle men do not march in lockstep. Each of the Czar’s … Continue reading →
No, the metric system doesn’t go to 11. While GorT will grant Dr. J the evil that is (was) Esperanto, GorT will take a bit of umbrage with his poke at soccer and the metric system. GorT is an engineer … Continue reading →
The Metric System….for a safe and secure society which I assure you will last for 10,000 years. Dr. J., for a physician and scientist, is strangely comfortable with the Imperial Measurements. He leaves his cc’s, milligrams, meters per second and … Continue reading →
Today, thanks to time travel, we were able to hold our First Annual Turkey Contest yesterday. And the results were about what you would expect. As you know, all of us Gormogons are superlative cooks in at least one area … Continue reading →
The operative known as Ghost writes to Dr. J., rather than The Czar: O Wielder of the Scalpel Most Fine, I normally write to my overlord who shall not be named, but this…was so…you, that it could not be helped. … Continue reading →
As the resident physician, scientist and dabbler in economics, Dr. J. was most amused by this joke matrix: Yo mama so fat, Ben Kenobi said, “That’s no moon, that’s yo mama!” Dr. J.
Continue reading →The other day, we all received one of the best question we have ever received. The Czar makes this claim because all six of us were quite excited by the nature of the question: To the Gracious, Learned, Infallible, and … Continue reading →
Gentle Readers, Dr. J. hopes you will forgive his lack of posts of late. He has been on the inpatient ICU and consult services and balancing that with a number of parental obligations at the Jedi Academy and Bene Gesserit … Continue reading →
Dr. J. has a million balls in the air, and consequently will be out through Wednesday, so any wit, wisdom and ponyisms will have to wait. Until then remember: Obamacare still sucks A government shutdown is not a bad thing … Continue reading →
Dr. J. can’t comment on liturgical music at mass this week…we bagged mass as we were wiped out from camping on the driving range this weekend. Where the f@¢# is Dr. J. and that Lil Medstudent who can’t sit still? … Continue reading →
Class warfare, Marxist policies and economic slut shaming have their consequences. Hurting the big guy hurts the little guys faster and harder. Gentle Readers, Dr. and Mrs. Dr. J. recently had a budgetary summit as money has grown tight over … Continue reading →
Like much of America, the Gormogons vacation as well. Sometimes it’s on our own with our own families and a number of us have posted assorted accounts for your amusement and edification. First a little background to orient our dear … Continue reading →
Gentle Readers, You are familiar with Lady J., Dr. J.’s beautiful Cavalier, who is resting next to him as he pens this missive. You may not be familiar with the fact that he’s owned (or been owned by) three cats … Continue reading →
That won’t cause nightmares! She’s really nice in person! Gentle Readers, Thank you for celebrating our fifth blogiversary with us. This morning, when we awoke, we found six neatly wrapped presents from the Blogiversary Fairy™. The Blogiversary Fairy is a … Continue reading →
Something special for our 5th anniversary? How about a picture we have not uploaded before? Here you are! This is us on the National Mallsee the Lincoln Memorial?we took back in 1994. From left, theres Sleestak, Ghettoputer F.X. Gormogon, GorTechie … Continue reading →
Hey, teacher, leave us kids alone! The school cafeteria has been the stuff of derision since time immemorial. When Dr. J. was a yout’ he learned pretty early after a hearty breakfast of oatmeal, orange juice and tea; that a Fluffernutter™, … Continue reading →
Dr. J.’s been out sick with a GI bug on and off since last Wednesday. He’s playing catch up at work today, so rather than write something insightful he will rely on teh interwebz to cover for him. Besides you’ve … Continue reading →
MLP – Nerdy or Geeky? At the beginning of the month, GorT in true GorTastic style wrote a terrific post on geeks and nerds using the six of us as foils to make his point. Indeed he pretty much had … Continue reading →
Dr. J. received this inter-castle memo over the weekend from Confucius ( 孔夫子), the Œcumenical Volgi (The Notorious ŒV): To: GorT, Ghettoputer, The Czar of Muscovy, The Inscrutable Mandarin, Dr. J. From :孔夫子, the Œcumenical Volgi (The Notorious ŒV) Re: … Continue reading →
Happy Fathers Day to all of our readers who are fathers or who have fathers! Let’s take a look around Castle Gormogon to see what the Fathers Day Fairy brought your Gormogon Overlords, Fathers to All, muah ha ha ha … Continue reading →
Dr. J. is headed into the wilderness with the Lil Resident and her Jedi Academy classmates. Yeah, we’re going up Spook Hill… While he’s away, please read this Washington Post editorial in which Ashley McGuire of The Catholic Association makes … Continue reading →
When Dr. J. was on the road last week, the latest AHA guidelines were published to great media fanfare. Indeed you, Gentle Reader, probably saw something in the news. Dr. J. decided to review the guidelines and share his reflections on … Continue reading →
The Ivory Tower’s a nice place to visit, come by, have a spot of tea. Dr. J. loved The Czar’s thoughtful analysis of Big Skool. He is right in that the tides are slowly turning as the Baby Boomers who … Continue reading →
You had no idea they were Democrats, didja? ŒV: Good God. RT @heminator: If you’re an ivy league educated woman, motherhood makes you a traitor to feminism? bit.ly/11xjqLL— The Gormogons (@Gormogons) April 23, 2013 Your Gormogons in recent days have been discussing … Continue reading →
A girl’s got to make a living… If you recall, Dr. J. discussed with frustration that there isn’t a good alternative to the ER if a patient needs to get tanked up with IV fluids due to a GI bug. … Continue reading →
“He who controls the spice controls the universe!” Baron Vladimir Haarkonen There is a 200 year old dispute between Tennessee and Georgia with regard to their border. A survey in 1818 placed the border one mile south of the agreed … Continue reading →
Seventy-five years ago today, Kal-El, the Man of Steel, the Last Son of Krypton was born. Dr. J. being the comic book geek of old wanted to salute the diamond anniversary of Action Comics #1. While the issue date is … Continue reading →
Operative SR Writes: Doc, This was an excellent illustration, except… reading the last panel, I thought, “Wait, Linus is a guy. HE DOESN’T EVEN GET *THAT* CHOICE.” Sigh. And yet, people still vote for this garbage. Teh stupid, it burns! … Continue reading →
Grey and Wrinkly Rights Apollo Physician and Asclepius and Hygieia and Panacea and all the gods and goddesses, making them my witnesses, that I will fulfill according to my ability and judgment this oath and this covenant: To hold him who … Continue reading →
Would you like a side of deductions with that? Gentle Readers, President Obama filed his tax returns. When you calculate his rate ‘Dr. J.’ style, that is Total Tax/Total Income, it comes to 16.2% compared against Dr. J.’s 22.3%. Now … Continue reading →
Dr. J. was reflecting on the approach that President Obama’s been taking with the public in his second term rather than his first term. During the first term, and on some issues in the second term, he reminds Dr. J. … Continue reading →
Puter tweeted (@gormogons, are you following us?) yesterday: GP Congrats to @nygovcuomo, @nycmayorsoffice for driving NY to #1 ranking in least free states! Way to go! #failure freedominthe50states.org— The Gormogons (@Gormogons) March 28, 2013 Mayor Bloomberg replied: Anyone stop to … Continue reading →
Work Wife II says the interns need to sack up. Dr. J. was alerted to this article at USA Today by Work Wife II, with additional analysis by the International Business Times. Feel free to read those articles for background. … Continue reading →
Ever get a song stuck in your head, and not be able to get rid of it? Well, Dr. J.’s buddy Jamie Jeffords, at the Eye of Polyphemus, while recovering from his most recent brush with death by colon perforation … Continue reading →
This has been making the rounds on Facebook: We cannot vouch for any rogue midichorines, however… Dr. J. has never met, let alone been in the same timezone as Deviant Artist ~Hearte42‘s bride, he swears! Dr. J.
Continue reading →An undercover field report, which the Operative delivered through an ingeniously complicated plan of (a) converting it to base74 notation, (b) engraving the characters on a grain of rice, (c) inserting it into a cotton swab, (d) embedding the swab … Continue reading →
While Dr. J. was applying some Force Lightning™ to a patient in the basement of the Castle he missed this tweet by Friend of the Gormogon Freddoso: Jedi mind-meld?— David Freddoso (@freddoso) March 1, 2013 Followed by: “Jedi Mind Meld.”— … Continue reading →
Even your Gormogon Overlords, the masters of space, time, sorcery and super-science occasionally run into glitches at the Castle. One such glitch occurred yesterday/today. When Dr. J. was checking the website he encountered a post that he had not yet … Continue reading →
Dr. J.’s seen a few of his former schoolmates who are far less attractive than Jenny McCarthy (and from a tony Quaker prep school, no less) waxing philosophic regarding the public menace of forced vaccination on that intellectual echo chamber … Continue reading →
The ‘A’ is for affluent. Slut shaming (also hyphenated, as slut-shaming) is defined as the act of making someone, usually a woman, feel guilty or inferior, for engaging in certain sexual behaviors that violate traditional gender expectations. These include, depending … Continue reading →
It’s A TRAP! Dr. J. has spoken before about President Obama being emboldened after his narrow election victory. He got his Republican sanctioned tax-hike without spending cuts and he is looking to continue with his Progressive agenda, by hook or … Continue reading →
How about The Tragedy of Darth Plagueis the Wise?I’m ready for my close up, Mr. DeMille! Dr. J., as you know, is a big Star Wars fan. He saw the original Star Wars on opening weekend as a yout’, and … Continue reading →
Nooooooooooo! Annie Hall won? Seriously? Gentle Readers, Dr. J. and Clan J. loves going to the movies. Consequently, Dr. J. loves to make his Oscar predictions. He doesn’t watch the Oscars because he finds celebrity self-congradulatory adulation ponderous. He does … Continue reading →
Dr. J.’s Work Wife II has something to say about your lisinopril. Dr. J.’s Work Wife II forwarded this NYT editorial to him last week and this was the first opportunity he has had to comment on it. When one gets … Continue reading →
You can tell a Prog by the yellow eyes. Filthy creatures! Proglodyte – (prog•luh•DITE) – noun – slang – A derisively accurate pejorative likening a Progressive to a blind, amphibious cave dweller. The term has a delicious irony in that the … Continue reading →
Happy Boxing Day, gentle readers…Your Gormogons took the day off yesterday to spend with our families. Nevertheless we wish you all a Merry Christmas. The Czar was celebrating with his extended family, and by celebrating, Dr. J. means impaling serfs … Continue reading →
Which one of these is not like the others? Dr. J. saw this post on NRO and suffered a case of the #headdesk. Apparently, Stanford University has found the need to appoint an atheist chaplain to the chaplancy at the … Continue reading →
Dr. J. was over at Jonathan Last’s blog the other day. It is totally worth adding to your bookmarks. He discusses politics, science fiction, comics, and the decline in Western civilization that correlates with the decline in fecundity. Dr. J. … Continue reading →
Operative BG writes in: Dr. J., Is it possible I’ve divined the actual location of Castle Gormogon? Dr. J’s prescription shows the castle’s phone number as 888-867-5309, which is apparently located at 2209 Whitten Road, Memphis, TN 38133. I’m thinking … Continue reading →
Some people put antlers, elf ears or candy canes on their car. Dr. J. went the whole nine yards, pimping his ride for Christmas: Imperial Star Destroyer – Christmas style.Note the Christmas Light undercarriage! But, as you know. Clan J. … Continue reading →
Dr. J. isn’t the biggest firearm connoisseur of your Gormogons. Indeed be might be sixth of the six of us in that regard. However, he is rabidly pro-second amendment along with the rest of your Gormogons. That being said, he … Continue reading →
Our friend Fred Woodbridge (@fwoodbridge) inquired as to if your Gormogons could recommend a first aid kit. Before Dr. J. could get cracking, The Czar penned this interoffice memo: Here is what the Czar does. He goes to Wal-Mart or … Continue reading →
Happy Thanksgiving from your Gormogon Overlords! Rather than gather in the castle feast hall, we travel to points hither and yon to break bread with family. Nevertheless, it is wondered It is often wondered what the Gormogons make for Thanksgiving Dinner: Volgi: … Continue reading →
The Autumn Fairy turns fallen leaves into Advent Calendars for GoodLil Residents and Medstudents… It’s Christmas time holiday shoppers, and while Mrs. Dr. J., the Lil Resident and Lil Medstudent were at the nearby big box pet-store attending puppy school … Continue reading →
Our AT&T U-Verse Box, programmed by the Lil Resident to record new episodes of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, delivered the one hour premier to our bin on Saturday. There were squeals of delight as we watched the premiere … Continue reading →
Our beloved Operative B.G. posted this in the personals section of the New Atlantis Lefty Arts Weekly Paper: Esteemed and Exalted Gormogons, Although my wife and I are among the half of Americans who pay taxes so the other half … Continue reading →
The Czar loves puppies…Dr. J. is sure he’s coveting… Dr. J. has been up to his eyeballs this week. On Sunday, we added a new member to the J. Clan. Namely Lady J. Lady J. is a Cavalier King Charles … Continue reading →
Long-time operative BG carefully stacked millions of sugar cubes and left this message spelled out on the Castle driveway before the ants ruined it: The Czar’s post regarding the unfortunate visit from his college roommate struck a chord here; I … Continue reading →
See, Biden was such a compelling clown last night that even Dr. J. is leading off with a Biden picture. Unlike The Czar and ‘Puter, Dr. J.’s approach to the debate was more like Joe Sixpack’s. The debate was background … Continue reading →
This reminds Dr. J. of a boutonniere he wore at his junior prom. Per The Czar’s request, Dr. J. is entering the fray regarding the Aspergillus meningitis outbreak of 2012. The Czar accurately breaks down the numbers regarding the … Continue reading →
Are you spending my future away, Master Progressive? Gentle Readers, Please pass this on to your undecided compatriots. About 15% of the electorate is still malleable. Despite a belief to the contrary, the middle-class and lower-upper class aren’t just about … Continue reading →
For those not getting the reference, there was this show called Clarissa Explains It All with Melissa Joan Hart… Mrs. Dr. J. is getting geared up for the November election. She bought signs supporting the GOP state senate candidate, 5th … Continue reading →
孔夫子 a.k.a. Confucius, our Œcumenical Volgi (the Notorious ŒV) has been conspicuously absent of late, especially given that he wrote the first post on our esteemed website. Well, the first in a wibbly, wobbly, timey-wimey sort of way, anyway. Well, Dr. J.’s dark … Continue reading →
The site will be Dr. J. lite in all likelihood for the next week or so as Clan J. moves out of the urban flat which we occupied for the last four months, and into the palatial ‘J. Abbey.’ Dr. … Continue reading →
Are you dancing your way back to me, Master Jedi? Dr. J. would like to wish The Czar and the Цесаревич hearty congratulations for the Цесаревич’s essay contest win. But The Czar isn’t the only Brag Hag amongst the Gormogons. In addition to ‘Puter, … Continue reading →
It is Dr. J.’s understanding that she has ringside seats to watch liberty dietonight. Let’s see if she provides some thunderous applause. Washington Post Columnist George Will writes today: Four years ago, Barack Obama was America’s Rorschach test, upon whom … Continue reading →
Man, you people get so needy. All right. By popular demand, we have added a second series of MiniFigures for your Castle Gormogon sets! Die-hard fans will be certain to gouge other people’s eyes out in order to get their … Continue reading →
Admit it! Wouldn’t you sometimes rather act out your own Gormogon posts, rather than read the ones we actually put here? Seriously, don’t you just want to go all ‘Puter on NPR once in a while? Or have the Czar … Continue reading →
Ask and ye shall receive! The Royal Mathematician spake (speaks? spoke? spokes? Spokane?) regarding the Great Square Root of Eleventy Schism of 2012: O Bringer of the Force-Lightning: Here’s the real mathematical scoop on the square root of eleventy: Pretty … Continue reading →
Czar has trained a small army of ninjawombats to strike fear into the heartsof his enemies. Secondarily, Czar useshis wombat army to deliver messagesto ‘Puter. Cubical poop? Really? Ouch. When not abusing various mood-altering substances, we denizens of Castle Gormogon … Continue reading →
Fantastic work by GorT on the statistical analysis of our writings. The Czar is bemused when looking at his own word cloud that “DON” appears there in the far right. To wear? A mafia figurehead? A Spanish lord? Ameche? Curious, … Continue reading →
GorT loves him some math and statistics. So I felt it was time to run the numbers on our corner of the internet here. The numbers are based on a snapshot of the blog from a few days ago. I … Continue reading →
Always two there are, a master and an apprentice… Gentle Readers, After Dr. J. posts this, he is off to attend a memorial of a late, great senior colleague, emeritus, Dr. B. Dr. J. has known Dr. B. since Dr. … Continue reading →
Dr. J. showing Minion the light(ning)… Dr. J. has a Berkeley brainwashed minion who he holds in high esteem. The young man, despite being a lefty, is an otherwise good and decent human being, and a fine physician (who knew, … Continue reading →
Citius, Altius, Fortius, unless you put in the third best performance on your team. Clan J. gathered around the holoscreen last night to watch the women’s gymnastics qualification round. NBC’s coverage was only trivially problematic, because the United States were … Continue reading →
Shoot that poison arrow through my heaaarrrt… Dr. J.’s buddy Kim Strassel has a piece on the WSJ opinion page regarding Obama’s “You Didn’t Build That” moment. Dr. J. has struggled to provide analysis of that speech that the President … Continue reading →
Not that Doctor, Dr. J., and you know how he’ll light the torch! ZZZZZZZZAP! A broken clock is right twice a day and a bat-shit crazy one-world-government progressive type can sure throw a terrific party once every two years. Tonight … Continue reading →
The Gentle Reader may recall Dr. J.’s discussion regarding third party payors and how that model has contributed to the rapidly escalating cost of healthcare. You may also recall how a gentleman who goes by the handle Cziltang, and blogs … Continue reading →
Dr. J. knows the Dream Team, the Dream Team are friends of his…Kobe, you are no Dream Teamer Back in 1989, Dr. J. spent the summer with a family in Spain as part of an exchange. Dr. J.’s amigo, who … Continue reading →
Dr. J. took in the Amazing Spider-Man with Clan J. and the Lil Med-Student’s wacky sidekick who, unbeknown to us took in the movie a few days prior and proceeded to inform Dr. J. and the Lil MedStudent about everything … Continue reading →
The Galactic Senate also voted away its citizens’ freedom… Dr. J. has said many times (and use our De Gormogonorum Mysteriis to search if you don’t believe him) that if you want high quality healthcare at the lowest costs possible, the … Continue reading →
Never trust the guy who says, “I will be Chancellor…” Dr. J. has yet to discuss the Obamacare decision because he was out of town, but more on that later. He wanted the opportunity to read Chief Justice Robert’s decision … Continue reading →
Are you threatening me, master choreographer? It’s that time of year again… The Lil Resident is heading to the Palmetto State for a national dance tournament. She and her team are defending their title from last year. Clan J. is … Continue reading →
One thing that Dr. J. learned from Dungeon’s and Dragons was to stay away from Will-o-the-Wisps Clan J. went to the moves this evening to take in Pixar’s latest, Brave. It was the first non-sequel movie from Pixar since Up, … Continue reading →
Dr. J. saw this at xkcd.com today: And in the words of Kevin Spacey’s Lex Luthor, “WRONG!” Over 30 years ago, when Dr. J. was about Lil Resident’s age, on a fine summer evening much like the one we enjoyed … Continue reading →
Yesterday on the Fox News Special Report Online post-show broadcast, Dr. Charles Krauthammer, a psychiatrist by training, by the way, intimated that Obama wouldn’t replace our gaffetastic Vice President Biden with Secretary Clinton for the 2012 race. His reasoning was … Continue reading →
Kids fight. Sometimes it’s a fist fight, and sometimes it’s an argument. Last Friday, the Lil Resident related a tale of an argument she had with Lady Jaye, one of her athletically inclined classmates at the Jedi Academy. “So, Lady … Continue reading →
Loyal minion Scott O, who you can read at his blog called ‘Thoughts from The Corner Office,’ writes in: Good Doctor, There is a fifth possibility for Mr. Obama to oppose less government spending in Europe, which is closely tied … Continue reading →
When Dr. J. saw this post by Kevin D. Williamson, he immediately thought of the Castle Grammarian, Torturer and Executioner, The Czar. He was quite pleased that The Czar penned something on the subject before Dr. J. awoke this morning. … Continue reading →
Mrs. Dr. J. and the Lil Resident, especially, love shoes. One of the brands popular with the Lil Resident, and a number of the young ladies at the Jedi Academy, the other independent schools in New Atlantis, and New Atlantis … Continue reading →
“You and the Naboo form a symbiont circle. What happens to one of you will affect the other. You must understand this.” – Obi-Wan Kenobi, Star Wars I: The Phantom Menace On Monday, Dr. J. was riding shotgun with Pa … Continue reading →
Dr. J., Mrs. Dr. J., the Lil Resident and Lil Med Student took in the Avengers at the local theatre on Sunday after mass. Dr. J. was looking forward to this movie for quite some time. He was not disappointed. … Continue reading →
